Shari
IsItFridayYet?
Please tell me I am being unreasonable.
husband and I have been together 6 years now. Christmas always goes like this...
We get up in the morning and find what Santa has left for the kids (originally it was easy child 1, difficult child 1, and wee difficult child - we never have easy child 2 on Christmas morning - we get her around 3-4pm on Christmas day). Now, it is just wee difficult child left at home. We don't open gifts as a family until everyone is there, including easy child 2. easy child 1 usually goes to fiance's folks house until we open gifts at home. Obviously, difficult child 2 doesn't make it back for Christmas now.
We pick up easy child 2, and we either open gifts at home, then rush to Two Broom's house to eat cold ham sandwiches and open gifts there and are expected to stay, or we go to Two Broom's house first, do our thing there, then open our own gifts when we get home. The problem with both scenarios is that when we get back home, wee difficult child is too tired to enjoy anything and we miss out on any fun as our own little family at home on Christmas day.
This year, Two Broom's can't stand long enough to cook a meal so she won't be fixing her traditional Christmas dinner. We are getting the kids a wii for Christmas and Two Brooms is buying some of the accessories to go with it, so we hoped to have Christmas at home, for once, have everyone here, so we didn't have to do the running around and the kids could open all their wii stuff at once and everyone could enjoy it with them.
husband's sister and Two Brooms don't want to do that. They want to have Christmas at the sister's, because her son (the nephew that's caused us problems) is leaving to go into the service and they want one last special holiday. Mr Two Broom's said the kids won't mind leaving the toys because they'll be getting more presents. I don't like to foster that attitude! And not for nothing, grandma doesn't give much anymore. Last year, everyone got money except the 2 youngest, and they got movies (at least that was the gift given in front of everyone...easy child 2 didn't even want to be there 'cause she'd already gotten her $200 present that grandma hid from us..."Christmas" at Two Brooms last year was just for show with easy child 2). Its not about the gifts, but the happy family atmosphere just isn't there, either. Not since sister and her hubby divorced. Since then, its been pretty cold around there. They don't play games or chit chat and enjoy each other's company like other families do. Two Brooms wants to watch her kids play on the floor like a Norman Rockwell scene. easy child 2 is "her youngest" left (wee difficult child isn't "hers"). easy child 2 is 12. She's past playing Barbies on the floor. We sit there and look at each other until someome deems it time to leave.
I used to enjoy Christmas and now I dread it. I don't enjoy the running around. My family has no Christmas tradition 'cause we squeeze in our family Christmas in whatever time is leftover.
Am I being selfish? Or rightfully upset (honest question - my attitude towards Two Brooms is so jaded, I cant honestly tell.) I know I am still angry about last year and Two Brooms and the whole family hiding easy child 2's "real" gift from us, and I am sorry but I can't see making the season special for the 22 year old who's joining the service. No one cared when it was difficult child 1's last holiday season at home. We did this usual routine. Its not all about wee difficult child, but I think christmas is about family and kids, and I feel like my little family and our kids (wee difficult child and easy child 2) are getting short changed.
Would it just be better to cancel our own Christmas on Christmas day so we can have it at a time that we enjoy, even if that means we have days early or late (we dont' always have easy child 2 right before or after Christmas day)? Any other suggestions? Am I just being selfish?
I gotta find a way to deal with this. Having to eat the last 3 meals with that woman has about made me crazy.
husband and I have been together 6 years now. Christmas always goes like this...
We get up in the morning and find what Santa has left for the kids (originally it was easy child 1, difficult child 1, and wee difficult child - we never have easy child 2 on Christmas morning - we get her around 3-4pm on Christmas day). Now, it is just wee difficult child left at home. We don't open gifts as a family until everyone is there, including easy child 2. easy child 1 usually goes to fiance's folks house until we open gifts at home. Obviously, difficult child 2 doesn't make it back for Christmas now.
We pick up easy child 2, and we either open gifts at home, then rush to Two Broom's house to eat cold ham sandwiches and open gifts there and are expected to stay, or we go to Two Broom's house first, do our thing there, then open our own gifts when we get home. The problem with both scenarios is that when we get back home, wee difficult child is too tired to enjoy anything and we miss out on any fun as our own little family at home on Christmas day.
This year, Two Broom's can't stand long enough to cook a meal so she won't be fixing her traditional Christmas dinner. We are getting the kids a wii for Christmas and Two Brooms is buying some of the accessories to go with it, so we hoped to have Christmas at home, for once, have everyone here, so we didn't have to do the running around and the kids could open all their wii stuff at once and everyone could enjoy it with them.
husband's sister and Two Brooms don't want to do that. They want to have Christmas at the sister's, because her son (the nephew that's caused us problems) is leaving to go into the service and they want one last special holiday. Mr Two Broom's said the kids won't mind leaving the toys because they'll be getting more presents. I don't like to foster that attitude! And not for nothing, grandma doesn't give much anymore. Last year, everyone got money except the 2 youngest, and they got movies (at least that was the gift given in front of everyone...easy child 2 didn't even want to be there 'cause she'd already gotten her $200 present that grandma hid from us..."Christmas" at Two Brooms last year was just for show with easy child 2). Its not about the gifts, but the happy family atmosphere just isn't there, either. Not since sister and her hubby divorced. Since then, its been pretty cold around there. They don't play games or chit chat and enjoy each other's company like other families do. Two Brooms wants to watch her kids play on the floor like a Norman Rockwell scene. easy child 2 is "her youngest" left (wee difficult child isn't "hers"). easy child 2 is 12. She's past playing Barbies on the floor. We sit there and look at each other until someome deems it time to leave.
I used to enjoy Christmas and now I dread it. I don't enjoy the running around. My family has no Christmas tradition 'cause we squeeze in our family Christmas in whatever time is leftover.
Am I being selfish? Or rightfully upset (honest question - my attitude towards Two Brooms is so jaded, I cant honestly tell.) I know I am still angry about last year and Two Brooms and the whole family hiding easy child 2's "real" gift from us, and I am sorry but I can't see making the season special for the 22 year old who's joining the service. No one cared when it was difficult child 1's last holiday season at home. We did this usual routine. Its not all about wee difficult child, but I think christmas is about family and kids, and I feel like my little family and our kids (wee difficult child and easy child 2) are getting short changed.
Would it just be better to cancel our own Christmas on Christmas day so we can have it at a time that we enjoy, even if that means we have days early or late (we dont' always have easy child 2 right before or after Christmas day)? Any other suggestions? Am I just being selfish?
I gotta find a way to deal with this. Having to eat the last 3 meals with that woman has about made me crazy.