Hello everyone, I'm new to posting, but have been reading this forum for 5 years. I know, what took me so long? This site has been so helpful to me the past few years. It's given me a lot of ideas and a place to feel like part of a community, even though I've just been reading your messages, and now I want to share our story and some things that have helped us. I'm 55 and my husband is 52. He's my second husband and has ADD, anxiety and depression, but manages pretty well in spite of that. My first husband passed away many years ago when our son was 5 years old. Son is 24, graduated from college and is working as a waiter and has his own apartment. He has ADHD, but manages well and is able to support himself and is easy to get along with. My oldest step-son will be 17 in a couple of months. He's a typical teenager. The difficult child in our family is my youngest step-son who will be 14 later this month. He has bipolar disorder, ADHD, anxiety, sensory issues and some social and emotional developmental delays. He's doing fairly well most of the time now, although he's still not easy to live with. Biomom lives in the same city and shares custody so the boys go back and forth between households every week. She's fairly cooperative, although she can be rather self-absorbed and selfish at times. I don't particularly like her, but everyone's polite. I remarried when my son had just started college and youngest SS was 7. It was really rough at that time as he had only been diagnosed with ADHD and anxiety and the psychiatrist had him on stimulants, which made his bipolar disorder much worse. He was constantly irritable and looking for a fight. He would rage for over an hour over insignificant things, like having difficulty getting his shoes on. He assaulted family members, teachers, other kids, and caregivers frequently. For some reason, he has never even threatened to hurt me, although he's yelled and sworn at me, but it was very stressful seeing him hurt others! That first year of my second marriage was my year from hell - even worse than when my first husband passed away - there were so many stressors. I lost my job, got married, sold my house and moved to a new city where my husband lived and away from my friends, my son went off to college, I started a new job and SS was spiraling downhill fast. I'm still not sure how I survived. Lots of self-care, spending time out of the house, talking to friends, and seeing an energy healer helped the most. (If you've never heard of energy work - it's things like acupressure, healing touch or reiki, and it's great for relieving stress.) When SS was 8, he was admitted for a year of residential treatment They took him off the stimulants and put him on anti anxiety medications, which helped reduce his rages and aggression slightly. He was there for a year and then they sent him home because he wasn't making any progress. After a rough year at home, he was placed in a different residential treatment facility for a year. He was doing somewhat better there and was to be released, but then started to behave erratically and become aggressive. The psychiatrist there diagnosed him with bipolar disorder and changed his medications and the transformation was amazing. He was much more cheerful and no longer walked around with a big chip on his shoulder. He has only assaulted someone twice in the past two years, and that was under provocation. He still has severe ADHD and anxiety and is constantly hovering in your face and fidgeting and interrupting and socially and emotionally a few years behind his age group. We're trying neurofeedback, which seems to be reducing some of those symptoms. I wanted to keep you all posted on how things go and share it with you.