You know, I had a terrible time with the GPS on my son's phone. We got it on there originally so we could find him when he was young. By the time he was 17 or so, the fact we could GPS him REALLY upset him. But I couldn't help looking whenever he was out. I even did it when he was away at college. When he was homeless...I finally dropped the app off my phone completely so I couldn't access it. Jabber kept it on his for a while, but I couldn't because I couldn't not look to see where my adult son, who had every right to go where he pleased, was.I wish there a way to do this without son knowing. The only solution to this would be for him to change his Google + password. For that to happen, I'd have to fess up to him on what I've been doing. Looking at his searches. He'd be very angry at me. So, that temptation remains with no real way to make it so I CAN NOT look. I will have to do this myself, I guess. And, control the urge. You are right. It IS invasive. I want him to have boundaries, but I have none.
It was like a weight lifted off me. I didn't know where he was and that way okay - because I wasn't supposed to know where he was.
You don't have to say, "I saw all your searches and knew you had relapsed before you told me. I've been snooping for ages" You could say, "I know I shouldn't have, but the other day I decided to see if I still know your Google password. I do. I can see everything if I log in. Did you know that? I think you should change your password, it's really old and not secure and I really shouldn't be able to snoop in case I get the urge to do it. I'm your mom and I get nosey and I don't want to do that to you, you're an adult."
Then he knows you know, and you don't want to know.
If that makes sense.