J finishes school at 4.30 and goes to the after-school play (at the school) until 6ish, when I come to pick him up. Today I went to visit a neighbour and got back about 4.45 to find... the assistant from the school outside my house with J, whose thumb is bleeding (and bandaged) and... a hole in one of the window panes of my front door. J greeted me immediately with "It wasn't me!". Apparently J left school by himself at 4.30 saying this had been arranged (not true) and then reappeared at school crying, saying he had cut himself on a piece of glass... I asked the assistant why they had allowed him to leave school by himself and was told that apparently in the "big school" (from your equivalent of first grade) they are allowed to go home alone... Surprising. Everyone seemed to think the glass had been broken by someone throwing a stone (that's what the break looked like). Anyway, after I had re-disinfected and re-bandaged the bleeding thumb, cleared up the broken glass, had a conversation with the neighbours about who might have thrown the stone into the house to break the pane, etc, etc, J went off to visit his friend in the village and I... suddenly realised the obvious truth. J hadn't cut himself on a piece of glass. He had come home by himself, found I wasn't there and the door locked, broken the glass, cut himself and gone back to school, then inventing a story to everyone... When he came back at 6 (as arranged beforehand), I took him on my lap and said very gently and conversationally that I thought he had come back and found me not here and then broken the glass to try and get in... he readily agreed, nodding his head and saying he had knocked on the glass too hard and it broke. When I asked him why he lied, he said he didn't me to be cross with him... This kind of thing just keeps happening and will keep on happening, I know it. Of course there should be some consequence and of course I did tell him very firmly all the things he should not have done but I can guarantee it will make absolutely no difference. I don't even know that he even really knows or understands he has done anything wrong... everything happens in the moment, sheer impulse, and then he just looks at you with his cute face and looks genuinely nonplussed and upset when you get cross... I don't know. I just don't know.