Rising from the apparent dead! I am back.

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by DammitJanet, Feb 21, 2020.

  1. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member

    I am sure quite a few people on here either remember me or might have read some of my posts. It has bean awhile since I have been on the board. I am happy to be back. Cant wait to catch up with those I know and meet those who have joined since I took my hiatus.

    So much has happened since I was last here. I actually cant remember when I last posted so I will just try to hit the highlights. Some may remember my ordeal with Brother in Law Buck. Well I believe it was December of 2017, he died. It upset Tony so that makes me sad. Not sad for me....lol. Cory has been in and out of jail/prison for the last several years due mostly to his substance abuse issues. He has been out since Easter of 19 but he has had several issues. He almost od'd twice and then in August he really hurt himself while trying to work helping a guy take down a 20 foot high metal building. He fell through the roof onto a cement pad and broke just about everything on his left side of his body. Of course no one had a lick of insurance so he was discharged within a week and he had to come to my house. He is still here. We are watching closely because we just don't think he can maintain without messing up. Certainly hasn't shown he can.

    Some of you will remember my problems with keeping up with housekeeping in my trailer. At least my old trailer. I live in NC and we were hit by both hurricanes Mathew and Florence. I happened to get lucky enough to run up with a program here that helped people who were damaged by the hurricanes but had no insurance. As far as I am concerned, I hit the lottery and this program removed my old trailer and gave me a brand spanking new one. My new one is much smaller but so much better built. I love it. I also have a handicapped ramp which is wonderful.

    Jamie is doing well. He is now a Sergeant with the county sheriffs dept in VA. He is happy. Kids are doing well.

    Now the biggest excitement. You will remember me saying my oldest son Billy was Aspergers. It took a long time for him to get out on his own but he finally did. For the past several years he was working IT for a local company but he wasn't able to advance far. Last fall he got the job of his lifetime. He is now an IT 4 working for FACEBOOK!!!!!!! Can you believe it? He is making very good money, living in Charlotte NC and flying all over for training. He also has an absolutely wonderful girlfriend. They are perfect for each other.

    Cory's two girls are growing up fast. Oldest is now 13 and in 8th grade. Just about grown. I will blink and she no longer be grandma's girl. The youngest is 8 already and in 2nd grade. She is mean as a snake. LOL.

    Tony is much the same. Can you believe I came to this board in Feb of 1997 and I believe I was member 500 or so. My boys have grown up from kids to full adults. Gosh...23 years. LOL...Tony just said Cory hasn't changed a bit since I joined. Sadly he is right.
     
  2. HMBgal

    HMBgal Active Member

    Hi! I remember you well. It sounds like life has been keeping you very busy. I'm loving being retired (since June of 2019) and I'm not missing working at all. I stay busy raising the grandkids (11 and 13), teaching six fitness classes a week, and the days just zoom by.

    The kid that landed me here is doing wonderfully well--I can hardly believe it. His mother is my major worry these days, but she's 43 and living her life and I'm trying not to enable her BS, other than to raise her kids. She only sees them every month or two, and even then only for an hour or so. She's a mess, homeless, living in her car, doing meth. I work every day on detachment.
     
  3. in a daze

    in a daze Well-Known Member

    Hi Janet, it’s good to hear from you. I remember you being around while we were in the trenches with our son. Sounds like Corey is up and down and the rest of your family doing pretty good. My son was out of work for over two years. We worked with his therapist and he finally was hired by a school for handicapped kids/adults in December. He does that 5 days a week and works for his uncle on Saturday. It’s all about the structure, which does him good. We moved him near us to his grandmas old apartment, which I was very nervous about, and let him have the second car for work during the day as husband works from home a lot. He still drinks on the sly but he’s a lot more functional than he was.

    It’s good to catch up! I hope other people we remember will post as well. Would like to see how they are doing.
     
  4. Estherfromjerusalem

    Estherfromjerusalem Well-Known Member

    Hey Janet! How wonderful to "see" you here again. I have often wondered over the years what has happened to you. Thank you for your update -- all in all very positive. Wonderful about Billy. I don't post much here these days, but I come and look every single day. I remember all the troubles you had with the trailer, so it is great that you now have a spanking new one. Please stay in touch with us now.

    Love, Esther
     
  5. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Hi, Janet! Thanks for the update! I was wondering how you all were getting along. Sounds like things overall are pretty good. Sorry Corey hasn't changed too much. I remember him well.

    I don't post much - Miss KT is all grown up now - but I check in regularly.
     
  6. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    Great to hear from you Janet. Very happy Billy and Jamie are doing well, sorry to hear Corey is still struggling. Awesome news about the house!

    I think that last we spoke, my difficult child Ache was having bad time mental health vice. He was just starting to open up some trauma history he had. Since it was a dove down and then thins started to get better. He had some very rough times. Self-harming, couple hospital stays, some really scary stuff, but eventually he worked through it with trauma therapist and some other help. He ended up giving up his sport career and is now in medical school and doing really great both academically (well, that never was a problem) but also socially.

    Joy also tried to became pro athlete, but didn't quite cut it, he is now at the Uni and happy.

    Me and husband are going strong. Things would be rather peachy if not our former respite kid, 'Girlie' who hit an early and very tough puberty. Her mom couldn't handle her anymore and we ended up taking her as a foster. She is giving us a run for our money. Structure, attention, rules, following them up, not having to function as an adult of the family, has helped quite a lot, but it is still a volatile situation. But we are managing.

    Great to have you back!
     
  7. Nomad

    Nomad Well-Known Member

    REading fast...will likely re read when I have more time. Great to hear from you!!! Exciting about Jaime and Billy. Sorry to hear of your son that has substance issues. Many MANY odd ups and downs with our adult daughter, but knock on wood, little to none of the very serious stuff like substance abuse or legal issues. (Crossing myself). Blessings.
     
  8. Deni D

    Deni D Active Member

    Hi Janet, I wasn't here when you were posting. But I love your username! I've seen your posts on searches from the past.
    Sorry about your one son, very glad to hear everything/one else seems to be looking up.
     
  9. Tanya M

    Tanya M Living with an attitude of gratitude Staff Member

    Hi Janet, so good to hear from you!

    Sounds like things are going well for you. I hope your son is able to continue healing and hopefully turn his life around, or at least in a better direction.

    Glad to see you back.
     
  10. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member

    Nice hearing from you guys. I guess two out of three aint bad...lol.
     
  11. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Hi Janet!
    So great to hear from you...and with so much good news too! Wow Billy...you must be so excited for him and his future...just awesome! I am sorry that Cory is still struggling but maybe one day huh.

    My two sons are still polar opposites! The oldest...who rehab told us when he was a teenager to "sacrifice one in order to save the other" wow wouldn't they be surprised today! Oldest owns his own company and makes 250k a year (works harder than anyone I have ever known!) and has been sober for about 2 years now has three darling girls and he and his wife are seemingly happy.

    Younger "difficult child" is still struggling. He lives with us or would otherwise be homeless which he was for a few years and I just couldn't handle it.
    He even got Hep C while out in the streets and we got him cured from that. He has applied for disability twice and gotten turned down. Occasionally he'll do work with hubs but only to buy Kratom from the smoke shop which he is addicted to now. He will be going to a 60 day Rehab in about a month. Can't wait! I hope it will help give him some insight and tools to help him remain clean.

    Younger "difficult child"s three children come to visit us around once a month. Sweet husband is coaching middle granddaughter in tennis! She is the one who will grow up to be a superstar...not necessarily in tennis but in life. Straight A student, very responsible and very caring.

    And our sweet "perfect child" is working a Masters program right now to become a marriage and family counselor! She is married (husband in software development co). And they have a beautiful home in Texas. We now live in Oklahoma (Indian territory for free insurance etc).
    easy child is also trying to have a baby (sadly she has miscarried a few times). We are hoping to have a 7th grandbaby sometime in the next 2 years.

    My awesome husband of 33 years is even more awesome without all the parenting challenges/decisions between us anymore. I got my best friend back!

    Hope to see more of you on the Board.
    Hugs,
    LMS
     
  12. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member

    Hey there tammy! My kids are also so different from each other. Billy took awhile to get on track but he was never a problem. Jamie was a complete average child. He just did things on schedule. The only real issue he had was he really wasnt emotionally ready to move out on his own so he got married very young. He cant be alone it seems. But I swear Cory is going to be the death of me. At this time, I expect nothing but bad news from him. Maybe he will fool me. I know he is going to have major trouble out of his youngest kid. She is so much like the worst parts of both her mother and her father. She is extremely manipulative. Drives me batty.
     
  13. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Hi Janet!! Great to see you back! I pop in from time to time. My difficult child is no longer difficult. He works full time as a manager at a grocery store. He is almost 28 and has had a job with the same company since he was 16! They love him at his job. They just got taken over by a national chain, so he is transferring to a store in another state in a couple of months. Or so he says. The cat will miss him greatly. Our cat (Captain Morgan) gets really cranky if Wiz doesn't stop in for a week or two. I find it hilarious. But Wiz has always had a way with animals.

    Jessi is working at a funeral home. She is doing well and they love her there. Overall she is doing quite well.

    thank you is in college full time, doing amazingly well. Especially given everything that happened last semester (in addition to losing his dad, thank you was without a computer for over a month while taking several programming classes! And his grades didn't fall - I am amazed by that).

    So we are doing okay here. I am glad you are in a new trailer. I worried about you in that old one! Way To Go Billy!! That is a great job and it sounds like a perfect fit for him!! I am glad your oldest is doing well also. Sorry about Cory being in trouble and then getting hurt so badly.

    (((((hugs)))))
     
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  14. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    Hi Janet, so nice to see you. I often think of you. You were a good friend to me when I owned the site. Thank you. Glad to hear life has improved for you. I think, like me, our difficult child's aren't doing as well as we hoped but not as bad as I feared. Take care of yourself. Tell Tony I said "hi". I'll never forget all the members and spouses I have met. It gives me fond memories.
     
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  15. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Jacket, glad things are going well for the most part!

    I’m rarely on the site these days as my kids are doing well overall.

    My difficult child is doing really well, even had a girlfriend that is as sweet as can be. He is still difficult but nothing like he was.
    My daughter is doing well overall, struggles with social anxiety. She is teaching at my school this year and working on getting her masters!