Something jolted me when I was posting. It appears to me (and correct me if I'm wrong) that just like our difficult children need to hit rock bottom to possibly change, we, as parents, need to hit rock bottom in our dealings with our difficult children to be able to practice detachment...indeed, to sometimes WANT to detach. There is an incident, something, that they do that makes us so done that we can finally detach and focus on our other loved ones without guilt. Or we just get so sick of wash/rinse/repeat with their bad choices that we lose our incentive to stay on the merry-go-round...thus we are then ready to detach. Just as some addicts never do quit, some enabling parents never quit either. Is it a disease to enable and is it a chronic disease if we keep doing it? Is it the disease of codependency? I firmly believe continuously engaging in our difficult child's abuse and bad behavior can kill us, just as their drugs can kill them. I'm not sure if anyone wants to discuss this, but I just felt like throwing my thoughts out there.