School troubles

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Loony Smurf, Mar 6, 2009.

  1. Loony Smurf

    Loony Smurf Member

    Ok this will prolly be long...i'm pretty ticked off

    MY difficult child 3 is in trouble at school. I recently left my husband and came back to my parents place in a small town in utah and enrolled my kids here. He was doing ok where we were, he was in the Special Education room for all the basic classes and had supports and a behavior plan and everything the rest of the time too. But we move out here and they say 'the IEP from out there isnt in a format we can understand and we need to redo it'. So they hold an IEP all his test scores and stuff from 2 years ago put in no problem. But he'd been there for 2 weeks by this point and they decided he didnt need the sped room for more than 30 minutes 3 times a week for writing. He had work refusal in class...wasnt doing anything really, except for a rare day when he felt like it. But they took that to show that he Could do it, just didnt feel like it. So they nixed the out of class time basically and mainstreamed him with a class of 35 kids.

    To top it off, they killed his behavior plan. all the stuff they were supposed to do like frequent motor breaks and extra work time and reward system...gone. They put as goals things like 'will mind the teacher the first time she requests something' with current status at 20% and goal of 80% of the time, and were SUPPOSED to put in how they were going to teach him to do that, but they didnt. So the teacher has been working on a simple punishment routine. He doesnt want to read with the group, so she sends him out of the room...which she's been told not to do cause he cant be trusted unsupervised cause he wanders off. The time she DID send him to another class it was to the 2nd grade :s which got the bullies really going. then she threatens to send him there permanently if he doesnt start doing his work.

    I told them dont even bother sending homework, I'm not fighting for hours everynight over 10 minutes of work. They put me down as a noncompliant parent.

    He's been bullied on the bus, at the busstops, before and after school, at recess, in class even. he does anything back and HE gets in trouble, but the other kids only ever get told to quit.

    The other day He pushed a kid back just as the principal walks out. then he didnt do any work in class. then the teacher saw other kids flipping him off...told them to quit but didnt say anything when they kept it up. so he flipped one off in return and she yelled at him and told him to leave the room. on the way out he says 'i should hit you'. teacher calls the principal and he suspends the kid for 3 days out of school. He's apparently too much trouble in class.

    I told the principla finally that's enough, i want him back in the Special Education room. His response...'we dont HAVE one here' OK, fine then, find a school that does and get him there. So now i'm waiting on the sped director to get back from vacation so we can move the kid to a different school.

    Man, i'm gonna have to totally redo his IEP again...this principal has already called and warned the new principal that my little troublemaker is coming...

    I told them i'm NOT sending my son back to that teacher. she's disliked him and pushed him around since day one cause he interrupted her day. she didnt have a nice thing to say during the IEP meeting, nothing but scowling and saying how impossible he is. she's refused to use any of my suggestions...and he hates her.

    and to top it off my 6th grader...perfect child and straight A student who always has a million friends...suddenly is an outcast cause she sticks up for him and wont let the kids bully him. For the first time ever she HATES school instead of loves it. Even my kindergartner is being bullied cause of difficult child 3's problems. for being related to a stupid 2nd grader.

    Small towns stink :(
  2. Anaheimfan

    Anaheimfan Blue Collar Boy

    Just throwing a child into mainstream classes is wrong.

    As well, threatening the child with sending him to another class--just outright threatening a child-- is also wrong, I would most certainly talk to the school admins about this teacher's actions.
  3. Loony Smurf

    Loony Smurf Member

    LOL...the school is 100% backing the teacher...apparently she's 'bent over backwards for the kid and cant do anything else'
  4. Anaheimfan

    Anaheimfan Blue Collar Boy

    Ah, the classic her word versus yours...Despite the fact that it's YOUR children, therefore, your word should have way more leverage.
  5. allhaileris

    allhaileris Crumbling Family Rock

    And do they even take into account that you just left your husband? That alone will make a "normal" kid act up!

    I hate to say it, but that's the way it is in small towns in conservative areas. They stick by each other and have a hard time dealing with something that is not the normal routine (this is from experience, my parents moved to a farm when I was in 5th grade and I HATED the kids because of this reason). Plus because they're small, they dont' have the resources to help the kids who need alternative teaching methods, nor (I assume) do they do all that extra training to help kids like ours because the budgets aren't there (I'm guessing, based on property taxes and whatnot).

    One thing I noticed - did you say there are 35 kids in his 2nd grade class? I thought you couldn't have more than 20 through 3rd grade? Is that only here in CA? My daughter's 1st grade class has only 15 kids with one teacher and one parent-teacher and that's more than enough to have to deal with. 35 kids in a class for that age means that kids with issues get ignored and mistreated.

    I'm glad you are holding out for the Special Education room. Good luck, it sounds like this is going to be a fight.
  6. Loony Smurf

    Loony Smurf Member

    actually he's in 4th grade. the teacher sent him back to a second grade class because he was being a brat one day on doing a test. then threatened to send him back permanently. in front of the whole class of course.

    There is only 1 class per grade in this little town except for second grade in the elementary. the higher schools have kids from several towns combined. there's only about 3000 people in the whole town.
  7. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Shame on that teacher! GRRR!. This made me sad as I read it as well as really angry at the teacher and school.

    Shine up that warrior mom armor-you are going to need it with that school. s. Hug