Should we help?

[Copabanana]

I am very sad too. Son left the area voluntarily 2 months ago from rental house where he punched holes in walls we were lovingly remodeling. For him.

He had not adhered to one of our conditions. We had not wanted him back 15 months before. He showed up.

He wants to come back again. Not really but desperate. Life not working for him. Variety of lies. That he has a bed in tx offered in 2 weeks and wants to come home in the interim. Promises. Coincidently in 2 weeks his ssi check arrives.

We had told him--no coming back with marijuana. He knows this.

Begged. Begged more. Suicide threat. Said: If I have to come back I'll kill myself. Begged more.

I weakened. I will talk to M if you provide verification of the bed and that insurance will pay by signing authorizations for me to call.

Two days of back and forth with M. He said. How is it good for him or you that he use residential treatment like a free time out to wait for his ssi check. He always goes to treatment when he has no money or nowhere to go.

I agreed. Told son on phone: We will be here for you when you are in treatment and wanting to be productive. Did not say: No. Just reaffirmed what has been stated 3 million times.

I had weakened.

Just desolate now. Heartbroken.

It is not so much that he is homeless, degraded, broke. (we offered to travel to him and buy food.) But OK. How could it not be that?

It is something collapsed in me. Hope for myself, my life. Meaning of life.

Defeat. Cannot get out of this cycle. Seem unable to detach. Did for a long time. Now? No.

So very very sad and broken. Even though I realize it is not my brokenness that I am carrying.

 

[Littleboylost]

Do you have to work and leave him home alone during this time too?

Yep I sure do.

 

[Littleboylost]

I am very sad too. Son left the area voluntarily 2 months ago from rental house where he punched holes in walls we were lovingly remodeling. For him.

He had not adhered to one of our conditions. We had not wanted him back 15 months before. He showed up.

He wants to come back again. Not really but desperate. Life not working for him. Variety of lies. That he has a bed in tx offered in 2 weeks and wants to come home in the interim. Promises. Coincidently in 2 weeks his ssi check arrives.

We had told him--no coming back with marijuana. He knows this.

Begged. Begged more. Suicide threat. Said: If I have to come back I'll kill myself. Begged more.

I weakened. I will talk to M if you provide verification of the bed and that insurance will pay by signing authorizations for me to call.

Two days of back and forth with M. He said. How is it good for him or you that he use residential treatment like a free time out to wait for his ssi check. He always goes to treatment when he has no money or nowhere to go.

I agreed. Told son on phone: We will be here for you when you are drug free, in treatment and wanting to be productive. Did not say: No. Just reaffirmed what has been stated 3 million times.

I had weakened.

Just desolate now. Heartbroken.

It is not so much that he is homeless, degraded, broke. (we offered to travel to him and buy food.) but ok. How could it not be that?

It is something collapsed in me. Hope for myself, my life. Meaning of life.

Defeat. Cannot get out of this cycle. Seem unable to detach. Did for a long time. Now? No.

So very very sad and broken. Even though I realize it is not my brokenness that I am carrying.

I feel your pain Coppa having him here has me all wrattled. I can't concentrate can't get anything done. I am so low today. I have to find the power and the strength to get through this.

 

[Littleboylost]

I do not know the law in Canada. In the state that I live in I could lose my house if drugs are found on the premises and be charged with a felony if I permit drug use on my property. I would not do well with CRAFT. It would seem that the parent has a huge burden placed on their shoulders. How long is CRAFT allowed to continue without the desired outcome.

I would not do well with CRAFT. It would seem that the parent has a huge burden placed on their shoulders. How long is CRAFT allowed to continue without the desired outcome.

I hear you Passa, I am a mess today. I hate this being in limbo. I have to get it togeather. I am not there at all today.

 

[RN0441]

You are probably in shock by all the events of the past few weeks.

Take a bubble bath. Get a pedicure. Spoil yourself a little.

He's going to do what he's going to do.

It's hardest on us moms. We just feel so much for these boys that we love so much. It's just impossible to digest it all. I still struggle with my feelings even though I should be an expert by now!

I call it mad/sad. I'm so mad I could spit and so sad I could cry! Some days I'm more sad than mad. It switches!

 

[Littleboylost]

You are probably in shock by all the events of the past few weeks.

Take a bubble bath. Get a pedicure. Spoil yourself a little.

He's going to do what he's going to do.

It's hardest on us moms. We just feel so much for these boys that we love so much. It's just impossible to digest it all. I still struggle with my feelings even though I should be an expert by now!

I call it mad/sad. I'm so mad I could spit and so sad I could cry! Some days I'm more sad than mad. It switches!

Hair cut tomoorw and work in the afternoon. I am hiding from the world today.

 

[pasajes4]

Your son has done (as the kids say) The most. It will take some time to regroup.

 

[Teriobe]

I would get the cigs. 2 addictions at once is hard

 

[Teriobe]

You are probably in shock by all the events of the past few weeks.

Take a bubble bath. Get a pedicure. Spoil yourself a little.

He's going to do what he's going to do.

It's hardest on us moms. We just feel so much for these boys that we love so much. It's just impossible to digest it all. I still struggle with my feelings even though I should be an expert by now!

I call it mad/sad. I'm so mad I could spit and so sad I could cry! Some days I'm more sad than mad. It switches!

Me too

 

[ColleenB]

LBL and Copa

I am so sorry for both of you..... I know how painful this is and how devastating.

I try to detach and am not very successful many days. I take it a day at a time... projecting into the future is just too scary.

Please know you are not alone and I am sending healing hugs to your broken mom hearts.