welcometowitsend
Member
difficult child skipped all but 4 classes this week. I got his attendance report for the last 10 weeks today - he has missed 1/3 of his classes. He is going to fail one class for sure.
The room he was supposed to rent has fallen through because the landlord found out he really can't afford it for more than about 3 or 4 months (which would have gotten him through to warmer weather). He was looking at another apartment to share with a couple- they backed out on him.
2 nights ago he left his friends place at 2:30am - left a note saying he no longer wanted to be a burden to them and spent the rest of the night in a fast food restaurant - the same one he works at. So he's been staying at this fast food place since Wednesday.
I tried to talk him into going back to his friends place but I don't think he wants to go or feels unwelcome. He refuses to go back to the homeless shelter and has stated that he does not want to come home. His FB status says he is tired of the bs., frustrated, feels like he's been swallowed up by an ocean. Sigh.
husband and I stopped by and saw his friend (the one he was staying with ) and asked him what was going on - that's how I found out because difficult child was vague about the whole thing. Then we stopped by the fastfood place to see him and he was hanging out with some friends. He looked like he hadn't showered in a week, greasy hair, unshaven, tired.
So hard to see. husband and I tried to talk to him again about going back to his friends place. We also told him that if he was willing to follow a few rules that he was welcome to come home. No shame, no humiliation, no judgment - it's tough to live on your own. He doesn't want to come home because he says we get along better when we have distance between us - which is very true but what he doesn't see is that we could get along well if he'd behave responsibly and respectfully at home like he does when he is on his own. I also tried to gently express my concern about his mental state and whether or not he was ok. He said he wasn't suicidal but I'm wondering how rationally he is thinking - it's so hard to tell what's what because of all the lies.
So I gave him a hug and he hugged me back and did not let go for a very long time. I told him I loved him and asked him to think about what he wants to do. I did my best but my heart is torn up.
The room he was supposed to rent has fallen through because the landlord found out he really can't afford it for more than about 3 or 4 months (which would have gotten him through to warmer weather). He was looking at another apartment to share with a couple- they backed out on him.
2 nights ago he left his friends place at 2:30am - left a note saying he no longer wanted to be a burden to them and spent the rest of the night in a fast food restaurant - the same one he works at. So he's been staying at this fast food place since Wednesday.
I tried to talk him into going back to his friends place but I don't think he wants to go or feels unwelcome. He refuses to go back to the homeless shelter and has stated that he does not want to come home. His FB status says he is tired of the bs., frustrated, feels like he's been swallowed up by an ocean. Sigh.
husband and I stopped by and saw his friend (the one he was staying with ) and asked him what was going on - that's how I found out because difficult child was vague about the whole thing. Then we stopped by the fastfood place to see him and he was hanging out with some friends. He looked like he hadn't showered in a week, greasy hair, unshaven, tired.
So hard to see. husband and I tried to talk to him again about going back to his friends place. We also told him that if he was willing to follow a few rules that he was welcome to come home. No shame, no humiliation, no judgment - it's tough to live on your own. He doesn't want to come home because he says we get along better when we have distance between us - which is very true but what he doesn't see is that we could get along well if he'd behave responsibly and respectfully at home like he does when he is on his own. I also tried to gently express my concern about his mental state and whether or not he was ok. He said he wasn't suicidal but I'm wondering how rationally he is thinking - it's so hard to tell what's what because of all the lies.
So I gave him a hug and he hugged me back and did not let go for a very long time. I told him I loved him and asked him to think about what he wants to do. I did my best but my heart is torn up.