As much as you might feel like your family needs you to be the one who's "UP," you can't shoulder the burden of this sad situation, nor should you try. It's okay for Duckie and husband to see you hurting and to take time to allow those feelings to surface. I know when my dad was dying, I tried at first to maintain the brave face, coming and going and reporting the facts of the situation to them each day, but ultimately I think when I finally let it all out and showed my family what I was going through it made them realize just how human I am and brought us all closer together. I still remember hanging up the phone with my mom after she called to let me know dad was gone and my kids and husband all just surrounding me and putting their arms around me while I let it all out. It was very freeing to be able to do that, especially after having grown up in a family that did not really allow me the expression of any emotion.
I hope this time brings everyone closer together and that they can use it to celebrate her life while she is still here. (((((Hugs)))))