It's been at least 4, closer to 5 years of living through my worst nightmare. If you had told me when my son was under age 12 that we would suffer through this horrid space, I would not have believed you. I have posted the rundown here before, it echoes a lot of what is common among us. My son is 17, going to be 18 next month...he has half his required credit load when he should be graduating. He has been charged with truancy and it went no where, they actually dropped it. He has been charged with various criminal offences; drugs mostly, those charges were diverted through young offender court, outcome was no record. He has been aggressive, violent nad destructive in our home. He has stolen and crashed my car, driving unlicensed and under the influence. He has brought dangerous people into our home and someone tried to kick down my door while threatening him in the fall. I could go on and on... Just before Christmas he stole my car again, he was under the influence again. I kicked him out of the house within 24 hours. He went to live about 2 hours out of town, with my ex-husband's family. 11 days later we had negotiated, and I use that term loosely, his return home. He returned with drugs, a knife, $600 in cash (with no job) and other paraphernalia. I called the cops, he ran, ditched the bulk of the drugs and the money. He returned and pretended he didn't know where he stashed it, the cops charged him with a small possession of marijuana fine. He left here that night and has not returned but not for lack of trying; at least once a week he calls to beg me to come home. He is still living with my ex-husband's family and still doing nothing, no school, no job, sleeps all day, smokes weed all the time, takes off for periods where he is unaccounted for, he's rude. I know I made the right decisions for me, and for him. I know how we were living was unsustainable. I know I have to let him figure this out without me front and centre. But I am very sad and disoriented. I don't know what to do with myself, I go to work and come home only to stare mindlessly at the computer. I'm looking for advice and support when suddenly you are left with yourself and the realization that there is nothing really left to do for your very much loved difficult child.