About a half hour ago Nichole comes flying out of her room to tell me Stepgfg contacted her via MySpace asking if her mother's name is Lisa. Nichole was pale and flustered and unsure what to do. She was in shock. Well, I didn't respond a whole lot better because I just stared at her. I didn't know what to say. Nichole was looking for direction if I read her expression correctly, but I was stumped. (doesn't happen often) I have warring emotions inside of me. I did not tell Nichole not to reply to stepgfg, although part of me wanted to do just that. I did not tell her to reply either. I don't think it's my place to tell her anything. She lived that pain right along with the rest of us, and she took it the worst. Stepgfg is her sister. If she does or doesn't want to reply that's her decision. On my part, I tried to go about what I was doing when she came into the room. I finally gave up. Too many thoughts are buzzing around in my brain to concentrate on anything else. Why on earth did she ask if Nichole's mother's name is Lisa? Yes, she hasn't seen Nichole since she was nearly 13, but Nichole hasn't changed in appearance except her hair is shorter. I have trouble believiing that stepgfg doesn't recognize her from the dozens of pics on her myspace page. Nichole has pics on there from several years ago. She's had her account for a long time. Why didn't she ask if her Dad's name was ****? I mean, that's the parent they have in common. Or how about, "Hey, there, it's you're big sister here...." I've been keeping tabs on stepgfg via myspace. I know without a doubt it's her. I use a different identity so she doesn't know it's me. My stomach is doing flips. I keep feeling like I'm going to vomit. Panic is hovering nearby...... This is not exactly how I imagined I'd feel should she ever make this move. Memories are running thru my mind and I can't make them stop. It's like a bad train wreck. You just can't help but look. First thought that popped into my head after 6 yrs of no contact........Oh, my God. What does she want? Awful. I suspect she's got access to a computer thru work or a firend as she's not on consistantly or often. On her myspace page she states she's married to the boyfriend, has 3 kids, and yet it also says she's looking for Mr. Right. This doesn't encourage me that she has changed. She has a picture of a man on her page who is not boyfriend/husband. God help her if she finds easy child on myspace. easy child will give it to her both barrels. Just mentioning stepgfg's name sends easy child into a rage. She can locate easy child via Nichole's page. Same for Travis. I guess I'll have to wait and see how Nichole decides to handle this new development. As for me, I'm not ready.