Strength beyond normal....

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by MichelleLynnFl, Aug 19, 2017.

  1. Tonight, out of the blue a man calls my phone asking about the ps4/tv combo I have for sale. Told him sorry, you have the wrong number. I knew exactly what was going on.

    My daughter has/had this PS4 and tv. On my last day seeing her she wanted to sell it, I bought it from her for $95.00 The tv is technically ours as we gave it to her to use.

    My daughter has been contacting my son so I asked him to call her and get this sorted out, which he did. But, I got more than I bargained for....

    She has been calling and texting my son because this friend/girlfriend....whatever relationship they had, the girl has left the shelter. This girl was very smart and also kept my daughter on the right track with seeking help, resources, jobs, ect. My daughter tells my son she is depressed because this girl is gone, no-one wants to hire her, not even day labor because she is female and they have construction jobs. That she is tired of being at the shelter everyday, that she is feeling the full weight of her choices.

    She asked my son if he is thinking of moving soon and if he would move near her? My son said no.

    She says she lost her brain and did remember the conversation and of my buying the PS4. Huh? Lost her brain??

    So of course I am worried as my daughter won't do a dang thing for herself, she has to be pushed. All the worry is back tonight of how she's going to do. But, you know what I did???

    I changed my phone number.

    The time has come that I am truly done with her and her life choices. Don't even want to hear how she is doing as my heart will break and I will just worry like I am now. She knew my old phone number by heart and called me the two times she was in jail.

    Strength beyond what is normal...
     
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  2. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    Do what you have to do. Stay strong Batmom.
    :you_go_girl:
     
  3. Thanks so much little. It's so very hard to do, I cried after changing my phone number. While I miss her so very much, I don't miss the fighting, the drama, the cops being at my house numerous times.

    When I feel weak....poor daughter...I have to remember how it was really like once she got past the, "I will do anything you say routine."
     
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  4. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    I remember all the bad times as well it allows me to protect my heart. We have to do this to survive. As I write this I am unable to contact my son this morning. Who knows where he is.
     
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  5. Am so sorry little. It seems the only time they contact us is when they need us.

    Your so right, we must protect our hearts. I led a life that was focused on her life, not mine.

    Just the adjustment/transitions are hard to make.
     
  6. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    Michelle

    You have come far. I know how hard that must have been for you to do that but it just had to be done.

    Try to focus on yourself for now. She'll figure it out and be stronger for it!
     
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  7. pigless in VA

    pigless in VA Well-Known Member

    Adding my strength in to the mix. I'm so sorry you felt like you needed to fly under the radar, but I completely understand why. I had two friends for whom I care very much. They were like sisters to me. I watched for years as their lives became smaller, and smaller and they became more entrenched in their mental illnesses. I became their sole link to the outside world. I had to end the friendship. Yesterday, I turned off the landline where they would contact me. I won't be speaking to them anymore. It's a sad but necessary step.
     
  8. BloodiedButUnbowed

    BloodiedButUnbowed Active Member

    Hugs to you, I cannot imagine how difficult your decision must have been. Others who don't know may say that you took an overly harsh step, but I would have done the same thing in your shoes. Know that by protecting yourself you are also protecting your daughter. What I mean is: enabling = death and you are doing what you must to ensure you are not a partner to her destruction.
     
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