Surprise, Surprise

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by everywoman, Jul 4, 2009.

  1. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    We had a large family gathering today. Toward the end my great-niece came by. She had gotten married this morning. She is 19---the same age as Jana. Her father is in prison. She married a 31 year old man she has known for 2 weeks. He has 3 children an 11 year old girl, a 10 year old boy, and an 18 month old. My sister (her grandmother) was/is devastated. And all I could think was "Thank-you Lord." There but by the grace of God goes I.
  2. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    Oops, meant to post this in the water cooler.
  3. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    EW, I moved the thread for you.
  4. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am sorry that she acted so impulsively. It is rarely a good sign. Did your sister know the man? Had the family even met him? I hope that if this is the mistake it appears to be, that it can be reversed with no trauma to his children. I hope that she realizes her mistake before they act any more impulsively, such as adding another child to the family.

    Many prayers being said that this turns out to be a shockingly good decision.

    Gentle hugs, and thankful it wasn't Jana.
  5. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    Holy Moly. I'm thanking your lucky stars, EW. :whew:

  6. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    I know what you mean.
  7. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    2 weeks, 3 children, 31 and asking her to marry him? This does not sound good. I would bet he's a controlling heap of you-know-what, and has a violent streak. I hope I'm wrong.
  8. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    No one had ever met this guy. E had called Jana last week and told her she was getting married in December. Jana was shocked yesterday. They made a call to her dad--in prison--my other nephew, his brother, talked to him. I felt bad for my sister. She has tried so hard with the grands. One lives with my other sister near me. The other (a boy) just went to live with my brother and his family upstate. E is by my nephews first wife/girlfriend. E was my sister's favorite. Hopefully this guy will turn out okay---but I don't have a good feeling.
  9. tinamarie1

    tinamarie1 Member

    I am picking my jaw up off the floor. A 31 yr old man with- a 19 yr old just creeps me out. My daughter is just a few years away from 19 and oh gosh. I can't bare to think of her with- a 31 yr old. Especially someone with- kids. It just doesn't sound right.
  10. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    I was 19, husband was a 35 yr old man, divorced with a 3 yr old. I married him after 2 weeks. So far that marriage has lasted 26 yrs.

    Not gonna say it was happily ever after........cuz it hasn't been. But the age difference has never been an issue in the relationship. Nor has K for that matter.

    The reason our marriage is dead in the water is due to behavior of husband's that has nothing to do with those things.

    Just thought I'd pop that in here. My neice married an older guy when she was 18, he had 3 kids, one severly disabled. They've been married quite a long time. Adore each other. She turned out to be a wonderful wife and fantastic warrior Mom..

    I'd be more worried about the Knowing Him For 2 Weeks part than the age difference. If I'd known husband longer........I doubt I'd have married him.

  11. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am also not upset about the age difference, but more the 2 weeks. Is he newly divorced or long time divorced? Newly divorced would really scare me. Rebound relationships are tough.

    husband was 33 when we met. I was 20. We knew each other 2 weeks when he told me we would get married. Almost scared me off, LOL!! We were married in Aug - we met the Halloween before that! He had no kids and no prior marriages. So far he is a great hubby in most ways. I am a pretty good mom and wife and he has matured into a great dad. But it took quite a while for the great dad to develop. At least he didn't balk at diapers!!! (He ended up doing more of Jessie's diapers than I did, LOL!!)

    I pray it turns out OK, or she can get out easily if it isn't a good thing.