System- unpredictable again...

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by klmno, Jul 8, 2008.

  1. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    difficult child had been scheduled to go to court this Thurs for a 30 day review when the judge originally sentenced him to a detention program that he didn't qualify for. Since she called us back to court 2 weeks ago and re-sentenced him, the PO and GAL checked and verified that the court scheduled for this Thurs. was cancelled. I called the PO yesterday morning just to make absolutely sure.

    So, I just got a call from the detention center that they have been advised that court is back on for this Thurs.- there has been a change of plans. And, when I pick him up this afternoon for today's counseling session, I am to take all his personal belongings with me and then check him back into the detention center closest to court, not the one he's at now. I asked if he was getting released this Thurs instead of 30 days after the last sentencing (which would be another 2 1/2 weeks). She said she couldn't tell me what the judge might do.

    HUMMMM.. it sounds to me like he might be released Thurs. She said the attny should be trying to contact me by now. So, I put a call into him. I also reiterated in my message to him that I have reached financial hardship and that we need to get all this court ordered stuff and PO out of the picture ASAP. (Don't get me wrong- my son still needs treatment and I'll make sure he gets it- if I can work enough hours to keep us housed and fed and keep medication insurance provided.)

    So, I figure maybe the judge was wrong again- maybe the 30 day sentence HAD to include the 2 weeks he'd already been in. Or, maybe all the crying and falling apart at social services yesterday made it's way back to someone in "the know". (I doubt that.) Or, maybe the judge just likes jerking us around...and we're going back to court for no reason, once again.
  2. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am so sorry. It must be incredibly stressful to have them constantly yanking you (and difficult child) around like this. It seems no one knows what the real laws/rules are and the system certainly doesn't know what it is doing.

    I will keep everything I can cross crossed that difficult child gets OUT on Thurs. AND that they get you some assistance in finding real help for difficult child. He is a good kid who made some mistakes due to an ILLNESS. I hate that they don't get that.


  3. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    The system stinks!!! There are so many gaps, and our poor children suffer because of that. I have missed a court date or two due to lack of communication. I swear the right hand doesn't know what the left hand is doing!!!

    Hang in there. :)
  4. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    Just don't know what to say except I am so sorry.
    Thinking of you, and hoping & praying for only the best outcome.
  5. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    This whole situation is CRAZY.

    All for something he did a long time ago that was probably medication induced...

    Its one thing for an adult to wait a year or two for a hearing, but kids, even teens, change so much in a year's time, it can be like a lifetime of difference for them...this is just insane.

    Hope it goes well, whatever happens.
  6. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Thanks, everyone! Really, difficult child is not a saint and he has done his share of wrong and illegal things. But I've never heard of or seen anyone discipline a child in such an inconsistent way. Not to mention, what it is doing to me and our lives in general.

    I might be paranoid at this point, but now I'm wondering if all those messages I left at the county mental health dept. has something to do with this. I was trying to get a hold of a case manager with Children Services Board (CSB), but I'm sure that many people over there would recognize our names and know about the GAL and court involvement.

    Is it possible that between the stuff that happened last year, and now this roller-coaster ride, I could have PTSD from all this? LOL!!
  7. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Yuck! I'm sorry the system is so goofed up. Hugs.
  8. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Thanks, Sharon!!

    So, anyone, I spoke briefly (like 5 mins) with the defense attny today about tomorrow's court. I told him he needed to asked for closure on this and that I had reached a point of financial hardship and could not meet the demands of probation on top of maintaining the level of mental health treatment my difficult child is getting because it is taking too much time from my work.

    He said he didn't think he could asked for this. I said yes he can asked for it and he needs to let them know. He says there is nothing he can do and that the judge has been so close to sending difficult child to state dept, he's concerned about asking for more. So, I try to detail that at least he could asked for more lenient probation level (meaning we would have to meet less often), or a set amount of time for probation so if difficult child did ok for 3 mos, he would be done, or get PO switched to one who will meet outside of the hours of 8:30-4:00. Well, he says maybe he'll try, he'll see how it goes.

    GEEZ, the judge gave what he asked for last time. Now, she has called us back to court for the 5th time in 4 1/2 weeks. Either this judge is a complete air head, or she has done all this just to scare the bejeebers out of difficult child. Personally, I think if she had wanted to send him to state dept., she would have done it already. No one around here has ever heard of a judge calling everyone back in because they changed their mind and want to make the sentence harder. This leads me to think she is going to lighten it- probably by letting him out tomorrow. How is it going to look if 2 or 3 weeks from now, she and PO here that I cannot meet all these demands? Isn't the time to tell her that tomorrow during court?

    One thing I am sure of, she is not going to lighten the sentence to something less than what the defense attny is even asking for. How can I get him to see that? I don't understand why he would not be in there asking for the minimum at this point and telling the judge the valid reasons why we are asking for this. Now, looking back on it, I wonder why last time we were in court he didn't even ask for any credit to be given for difficult child's time served. He just says he was afriad to because she is so close to sending difficult child to state.
  9. How frustrating! Hugs to you. I hope it all goes well.