Teacher's Aide-the 1st day

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by teacher's aide, Oct 1, 2007.

  1. teacher's aide

    teacher's aide New Member

    Wow, lots of info. Like I said I have lots of catching up to do in regards to school policy, laws, etc...

    Okay, I am in the U.S. in Texas. I retired from the Airlines and now live in a small rural town pop. 2247. You have to drive an hour to get to a Wal-mart!

    I was so anxious this morning but everything went really well. My number one goal was to get through the day without an "episode".

    I did have him alone to myself except for 1-15 min break (which is when I first saw the principal for the day) in the morning and a 30 min lunch. I picked him up in the cafeteria this morning and we went straight to our room, closed and locked the door. He warmed up to me right away. He brought a small football with him. He asked if I wanted to play, so we played football. After awhile I suggested play, drink of water, work. He agreed and we shook on it and it worked for the rest of the day.

    The principal brought his lunch in and he ate in the room while I went to lunch. When I came back they were talking about rewards. She told me that he would be allowed some time in the gym (just he and I) if he continued to behave. She came back later and escorted us to the gym. He played basketball for about 15 minutes and then she walked back with us. That's when it got weird. She sat down while (I'll call him J.) J. layed on the floor between us. He had a soda that he had had in his backpack.
    She told him not to take a drink without asking me for permission. He tossed it around a little, while we talked. Then he TOOK A DRINK, she grabbed it, he grabbed it back, THEY ran around the room a little, she ended up with orange soda all down the front of her. About that time the sec. comes on the intercom to say his aunt was there to pick him up (he got kicked off the bus Friday). After he left she says "see what I mean". I mentioned **picking battles**. Oh, and she took away his gym time for the following day!! She did say that the intention was for him to return to the classroom BUT she couldn't return him to the classroom as long as he was a danger to the other children.

    She did say she thought he had ODD or CD. She also said he had a Dr.'s appointment. on WED. That his Mom had agreed to that. Then she told me I needed to do a schedule for doing math at this time and reading at that time, etc... I know I know nothing, but it just seems to me that being too rigid and not being flexible would be a problem. She also noticed the ball in his backpack and said he was not supposed to have either in the room with him.
    I went and bought a nerf football on my way home.

    I would just like to have some time to establish a relationship with him and gain his trust before I am given too many rules to abide by (does that make me ODD!??)

    I think all of those who have been handling him have PTS. And I have to admit I kept waiting for the other shoe to fall all day.
    I know that I DON'T know what they have gone through with him but I feel like they are trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.
  2. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    Good--It sounds like you're off to a good start. That episode with the principal sounds a little odd to me.

    One caution--if this child is a potential danger you don't want to be locked in a room alone with him, especially if the room is isolated in any way ie no observation windows, in a quiet part of the building, has no intercom to the office, etc. Hopefully you will come back and tell us this is a room with windows right off the office so there is ample opportunity for others to observe what is going on. You don't want to be in a potentially dangerous situation yourself, nor do you want to be put in a position that the kid could accuse you of who knows what.
  3. starcloaked

    starcloaked New Member

    You are going to make all the difference for this kid. He'll probably test you in the next few days--don't give up. You're already on the road to making this work, and wow, maybe the principal will learn a thing or two.

    Thanks for being there for him. I hope my son encounters a lot of people like you along his journey.

  4. teacher's aide

    teacher's aide New Member

    We are in a building with the Nurse, Music Teacher, Coach, and another lady that I am not sure what she does. No windows on door or otherwise. Buzzer has been disconnected because he would push it. I was told that they would be able to hear him if he looses control and would come running. Plus there was a lady that sat outside the door for part of the morning. Several times I unlocked the door so we could get a drink and she would be holding the door from the other side (thinking he was trying to get out). I explained what we were doing play, drink, work.

    The thing I worry about most right now is having the energy to keep up with my young charge.
  5. morningcuppa

    morningcuppa New Member

    Well done!
    It sounds like you did brilliantly. He is lucky to have you.

    I would also be a bit wary of being alone in a locked room with a child. I do not think that would be permitted here in the UK. Do you at least have a mobile phone handy so you could get help if needed. Surely a buzzer could be placed high enough so that he could not reach it.
    Just concerned for you safety.
  6. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    You would think in this day and age schools wouldn't be so stupid as to assign an untrained aide to a student in a locked room without windows and relying only on others outside to hear you in an emergency but here you have it, folks! No offense to this aide who obviously is doing her best but it certainly isn't wise for anyone involved, not to mention a huge liability to the district.

    TA, for your own protection it would be good to speak to the principal about getting a more reliable form of communication (cell phone, pocket intercom, raising the disconnected buzzer to above the child's height). And being behind closed doors alone with a student is a HUGE no no so they need to install a window in the door. Stress these for the sake of your protection and the school's liability.
  7. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member

    She set him up for sure! Of course he took a drink! I would am betting any ODD kid would have. Some may have tried to hide it, but most probably right in front of you.

    Just tell her you need time to establish the relationship and she should not interupt the flow you have going.

    Also, I agree with SRL - be sure you are safe. Whatever it takes.
  8. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Being alone in a locked classroom with no window sends up huge red flags to me. You are being put in a position where you could be accused of anything with no way to defend yourself.

    We are not allowed to put up anything in the window of our classroom doors that would block the view of what is going on inside. That is for both the students' and teacher's protection.

    Parents today are very quick to sue; I would not allow myself to be put into a compromising position.

    Please be careful.

  9. Sheila

    Sheila Moderator

    You did great!

    There's no doubt that some kids are extremely difficult, but I can't help but to wonder why a principal would intentionally trigger a student.

    I hope mom gets some cooperation from the student's doctor and that if denial on the parent's part is the problem, reality sets in.
  10. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    I agree, you did an awesome job. It really does sound like the principal set him up but it may have been done so you could get a preview of how he's going to react when you toughen up. At least, I hope that was her idea. Some schedule might be a good idea since the goal is to have him return to a classroom. It might be a good idea to find out what his class schedule is and try to semi-integrate it.

    I also agree that you need a window and a bit more protection than just the chance that others will hear if something goes wrong.

    Good luck and let's hope his testing will be manageable for you.