"The worst thing for a parent, after losing a child, is watching your child make the same mistakes

Southern51

New Member
-you did".

Just heard this line in a movie. And because I've never made the mistakes my son is making (I've never used heroin), I made a slight change- "watching your child make life-threatening mistakes".

It hurts. He's not here, he's on the other side of the country, so we're spared the constant drama but it still hurts. I keep wondering what he's doing to get the money and whether he is stupid and careless enough to share needles. I keep worrying that he'd overdose and die. So many people are OD'ing these days.

It hurts knowing there's nothing I can do. He's 22. He's a veteran, been through two tours in Iraq and one in Afghanistan. He came out of it alright. No major traumas or injuries, and a lot of cultural insights (he picked up some Arabic and Dari). And then he just crashed and I don't know why.

It hurts knowing that I can't maintain a normal relationship with him, because he will try to pressure us into giving him money and he's not past lying to us (like all addicts, he's a pathological liar). It all just hurts like crazy.

It hurts reading this board and knowing that so many people are going through similar pain. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.
 

RN0441

100% better than I was but not at 100% yet
Southern:

Welcome and I'm so sorry you are going through this.

I hope you are taking care of YOURSELF and have support and/or are seeing a therapist or involved in a group of some sort.

Be good to yourself. That's all you can do.

We get it.
 

susiestar

Roll With It
Welcome, Southern! I am sorry that you have to experience this pain. It truly is a horrible thing. I am sorry that you had the need to seek us out, but I am very happy to meet you.
 
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