Update - daughter

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by DaisyC1234, Jan 17, 2020.

  1. DaisyC1234

    DaisyC1234 Member

    My daughter's new years resolution didn't last long. She went on a drunken violent rampage at her on again and off again boyfriends house on Wednesday night. Cops were called, her friend was arrested and she called my dad to pick her up. It turns into a he hit me she hit me. Accusing each other hitting the other. Who knows. She went there looking to get into it is how I see it.

    My dad took the car they loaned her away and dropped her off at my cousin's ex-wife's house, she stays there often anyway.

    My dad had a talk with her she's crying. My dad is upset, because he says if it weren't for the kids it would be easier. I gave him a copy of the detachment article. I told him she's working at the strip club and not where she told him, he asked how I knew. I told him she left her FB account open on my computer and I saw messages from the manger at the strip place and she left some skimpy outfit on the counter yesterday, I guess she forgot it, plus she had a bag of my pain pills next it. They were only 600mg pills of ibuprofen, but still....

    So this is were we are now. It's so stressful. I try not to let it affect me, but it's so hard, some days are better than others. Me and my other daughter are going shopping this weekend. She deserves some of my time, happy time.

    My therapist said to plan a trip, just plan it was my assignment.
     
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  2. WiseChoices

    WiseChoices Active Member

    Daisy, what a stressful ordeal! Please remember that you are only responsible for yourself. You are powerless over everyone else. Your daughter's drinking, her job, where she stays - all that belongs to her.

    It's a great idea to have a nice time with your other daughter, to focus on you, and to entertain ideas about what you want for you in our own life.
     
  3. DaisyC1234

    DaisyC1234 Member

    Wise, I know that I am only responsible for myself and only control me and my actions, but it just so difficult and I can't help but feel guilty a lot of the time.
     
  4. BusynMember

    BusynMember Well-Known Member

    I feel guilty far less, although I slip up. I would feel terrible if my kind-hearted father was directly hurt by Kay. But can we control loving grand parents who don't get it as much as we do? No.

    I pray things get easier and send hugs
     
  5. Triedntrue

    Triedntrue Active Member

    Please don't let her make you feel guilty she chose to do what she did not you. Your dad chose to do what he did. You can only control what you do. Prayers are with you
     
  6. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    Daisy, where was the 2 month old while all this went on?
     
  7. Blindsided

    Blindsided Face the Sun

    I am so sorry, but nothing surprises me. Focus on what you can do. We cant take responsibility for other adults choices.
     
  8. JMom

    JMom Active Member

    Daisy,
    Hugs to you and the babies.
    Jmom
     
  9. DaisyC1234

    DaisyC1234 Member

    Both the kids were with us thank goodness.

    Thank you!
     
  10. ChickPea

    ChickPea Active Member

    Your daughter is similar to mine (just reading your signature). I'm sorry. NOT easy to deal with. My daughter lies, too, and believes the lies she says. Or bases reality on the lies she says. I don't know how to explain it. Enjoy your time with your other child. Don't feel guilty. You both deserve it.

    Hugs.