Update on Us ... Long time no see :0)

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Stella Johnson, Jul 27, 2011.

  1. Stella Johnson

    Stella Johnson Active Member

    We are still alive. :hangin:But lately not by much. Sabrina recently turned into a full fledged teenager. She's always been delayed a bit in the emotional / social department. She is still very immature for her age but her mouth has caught up with the rest of the 14 yr olds.

    I bought a new house in the next town over from where we were. The house we first had turned into an all out nightmare. Almost every kid in the neighborhood was a bully. Everyone got bullied but difficult child being the target that she is got it even worse. She refused to be a bully so they all pounced. THey made up horrid lies about her and spread them everywhere. She was hit with rocks and sticks daily just riding her bike. The last week we were there before moving two teenagers tried to run her over or act like they were. Either way doesn't matter. We pressed charges when it first happened but after we moved we had so much going on with my health, difficult child was doing so much better away from that place so I kind of dropped the ball on purpose. WHile I think the girls should pay I don't want to stir those old feelings up with difficult child. She was a wreck and I was too. I feel badly that those kids may hurt someone else someday but on the other hand... we just couldn't handle it. If we had stayed in the old house I definitely would have gone all the way with the charges.

    The new neighborhood is wonderful. The kids all get a long for the most part. Just normal kid stuff really. Nothing like the old neighborhood. You'd think they old one was the ghetto but it was one of the more affluent areas of Dallas. The neighborhood itself was just a middle class neighborhood. The new one is more expensive but the house is just awesome. I will see if I can figure out how to load a picture on here. THis site is very techy now. lol I'm not that advanced. What is a "Twitter Hash Tag"???? Boy am I feeling old. :groan:

    I think I posted a few years ago that I have RSD/CRPS II now. It is a neurological disorder. Started from a botched repair surgery when I accidentally stabbed my hand in the kitchen with a steak knife. Moral of the story: Don't use a steak knife to cut overcooked brownies. :bag:

    I stopped working in September 2009. It was too hard to handle the treatments, disease, and working full time using my left hand not to mention all the other symptoms and medication side effects. I've tried to make the best of it. I started a support group for people with chronic pain and a website where I sell my artwork and also make custom made clothing for people with RSD. We have to wear super soft clothes with no itchy or rough stuff. Organic stuff seems to work the best.

    difficult child is starting high school this year. I can't believe it has been so long. She was in Pre-k when I first came here. I wouldn't have made it without this group. Fran saved my rear many many times too.

    difficult child was doing really well until recently. She had gotten over her jealouy issues with Andrew (SO). She was doing well in school and had come a long way. She's reading much better. Then it all came crashing down.

    First she started refusing to bathe. One week I decided to let up and see how long she would go. She took one bath in 8 days and that was because I forced it the eighth day. She stunk and I couldn't take it. I was hoping natural consequences would kick in and maybe her friends would say something. Nope. Well they finally did kick in. She ended up with a bacterial infection in her private area last week. Still is refusing to bathe. It's a fight every day while she argues and ignores.

    She went to special needs camp this summer and met a new friend. This girl is 16 about the same level intellectually as difficult child and lives at the state school. They call it something nicer now but it's the same thing, same building. THis isn't the kind of kiddy criminals.

    Turns out this girl is 16 and pregnant by another kid in the state school. She got difficult child talking to some boy. He was calling 90 times per day. difficult child ran up her cell minutes and took over the home phone. Drove me insane. Then she wants to meet in person and begs me to pick him up and take hinm to the mall. Well I don't know this kids story and it isn't public info so I called up there and asked to speak to his guardian. Turns out it is his mother.

    His mom calls and tells me he is bipolar and major cutter. He will cut with anything at any time whenever he has the chance. AND HE IS 20 YEARS OLD!!!!!!!!. difficult child lied and told me he was 16. She honestly didn't realize it was illegal to date him but thought I just wouldn't like his age so lied to me. I explained about his disorder and she realized that this was not an appropriate relationship. She stopped all communication with him. I was really proud of her.

    Then came the phone calls from the 16 yr old girl's boyfriend/baby daddy. Now he's calling all hours of the day and night. I don't let her have most of them unless she gets to it before me. I've explained it isn't appropriate for him to call all the time or probably not at all but she doesn't get it. She insists they are just friends and I think she believes that but I doubt he has intentions of just friendship. The pregnant girl is calling now asking if she talked to him because she can't find him and he isn't calling her. This state school drama has got to stop. It is killing me. I've decided to figure out all my phone features. I know I have call block just don't know how to use it.

    I nearly fell off the sofa on Monday night when I opened my email. I had an email from Kris. The Kris that used to be a moderator here and died a few years ago from complications of diabetes. It ended up being spam. Looks like her email got hacked. It really startled me and then made me sad thinking about her. I do miss her. She was full of pea and vinegar but had a great heart. If you guys get one don't be alarmed. Her email was hacked.

    I think that about sums up the major events. lol I'm going to read some posts and try to catch up.


    Steph aka Stella
  2. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    welcome back Steph! Im tickled to death to see you here. Wow, Sabrina is going into HS this year? Time is flying isnt it? I think we used to joke about that happening didnt we? LOL. I told you it would happen before you knew it.

    Ugh on the whole bullying issues. Glad you were able to get away from that. Also glad to hear you are still with Andrew. Cool beans. Lucky girl, lucky man!

    The whole issue with the "kids" from the state school does sound concerning. I hope you are able to handle it with phone controls.

    This new site is a bit techy but its basically just normal web stuff. Nothing too hard. I have no idea how to use twitter hash stuff so dont ask me. I only added twitter to my phone to follow the Anthony trial...lol. One person is on my twitter page...lmao. Im about to shut it down.
  3. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    Gosh Steph, Sabrina is growing up. Congratulations on the new house.
    It was a heck of a ride back in those days when we all reached out to each other.
    I am so sorry that you have had such horrid health problems that were triggered with a stab with a steak knife. Who would have thought? I know you always worked your whole life. It must be pretty upsetting to have to give that up.

    Hope Sabrina gets through puberty without too many bruises and scars. Are you thinking about the deprovera shots? You know me and being proactive.
    When I am visiting with my difficult child I'll give you a call and we can meet for lunch.
    How sad about getting an e mail from kris. She crosses my mind from time to time also.
  4. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Hey Steph (just got your PM)

    Good to hear from you too...Sorry about the bullying Sabrina experienced, how awful. She has always been such a sweet girl I can imagine how upsetting that was for you both.

    I'm glad you've moved to a new area where Sabrina is doing well. It's important to feel safe where you live.

    Definitely keep an eye on that State School Kids situation. I know Sabrina probably loves the attention she is getting but doesn't sound like the "older" kids she's gotten aquointed with there are a good influence on her.

    I still have to laugh, forgive me, in remembering one of the times I took care of Sabrina...she was Bouncing Off the Walls. Manic of course, but she was little bitty thing then and Oh so cute. I know from pics I saw a few years ago she has really matured into a very pretty girl. Have to be careful.

    I hope if/when you and Fran get together for Lunch one day that you'll give me a call so I can see the both of you too.
    Hugs and Welcome Back,
    ps...I am mostly on PE Forum now. Young difficult child is in Jail...maybe he will learn.
  5. Stella Johnson

    Stella Johnson Active Member

    Janet, It's so good to see you are still here ! And a moderator too! That is too cool. I know how much this board has meant to you over the years. I've been wondering how you were doing. How are your medical problems going? I noticed your signature says something about post meningitis syndrome. What kinds of issues are you having? I had meningitis back in 2000. It was pure agony. Took about a year before I was completely normal again.

    Yep, she has grown way too fast. I am scared to death. She is fully filled out now. Not a little skinny petite little girl bouncing off the walls anymore. For the most part she is pretty calm now. The defiance and her tongue are the biggest problems now. At least I don't have to deal with rages anymore. That is a big improvement. I think she basically just grew out of them.

    So good to talk to you again! :group-hug:
  6. Stella Johnson

    Stella Johnson Active Member

    I know. Who would think a stupid kitchen accident could turn your world upside down and change you forevery physicall and mentally. Took about a year to accept what I had. I went into a pretty deep depression and pity party. Almost drove everyone away from me. It was like dealing with a death in the family. You go through depression, anger, acceptance, etc.

    I do miss working so much. I loved what I was doing and had an awesome job with a great company. I had benefits out the wazoo. That is what saved me when I got hurt. Had I not had that job when this happened I would have been screwed.

    Sabrina is already on Lo-Seasonique because when she was around 11 she began having the worst periods. She was flooding and nothing stopped it. Sometimes it would last for weeks at a time. So between her emotional PMS stuff, constantly washing clothes from accidents, and going to the doctor with her all the time I finally gave in and let the doctor try the bc. I just wasn't happy about having her on those hormones so young. She started her period when she was almost 10. At the beginning it was no big deal but around 11 it became unbarable. So yep, we got it covered. I actually thought of you when I picked it up at the pharmacy the first time. Remembered your fast rides in the BFT with the doors locked. :congratualtions:
  7. Stella Johnson

    Stella Johnson Active Member

    So glad to chat with you again. I've wondered how you have been doing. Sorry to hear the boys still have not gotten their heads screwed on. Wish there was a magic cure for all of our kids behavior problems.

    difficult child is fully grown now. She is an inch and a half taller than I am. She has put on a little too many extra pounds but is trying to eat healthier. She just has no self control. If there are 5 cookies in the kitchen she eats all of them just to make sure she isn't left out. You would think she grew up with 10 kids in the house who barely got to eat. She does the same thing at dinner.
    She is beautiful, I must say. We had professional pics done a few weeks ago that I need to go pick up. I do have a website they put them on. Will try to post it when I get home so you can see what she looks like now. You might not recognize her. Thankfully she doesn't bounce off the walls like she used to.

    If/and when I finally catch up with Fran I will make sure to invite you. Would be lots of fun to get everyone back together. Fran shouldn't have run off and left us. (Where is that butt kicking smiley?) We will have to get together soon anyway since we live so close now. Would be great if Esther came back sometime. I really enjoyed meeting her at Fran's that day.

    I saw your other post. Andrew and I have talked about going to Israel many times. I would absolutely love it but I'm a little chicken. Every time I make up my mind to go I see something crazy going on. I doubt it is as bad as it seems from watching the news since they only report the bad stuff that goes on in Israel.

    How have you been? Are you still running your business from home? How is your family?
  8. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Steph..You remember when I had the meningitis because you sent me that wonderful robe and I still wear it and think about you. Of course, I have to pry it away from Keyana...lol. She loves it too. She is now about the same age as Sabrina was when we met. Can you believe it?

    Do you have Skype? Maybe we can chat on that and catch up sometime.