When it rains it pours

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by mstang67chic, Feb 4, 2010.

  1. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    husband just called from his mother's apartment. He and his sister go over daily to administer her medications and check on her as she's severly schizophrenic and her health isn't the greatest. Lately she's been having issues with her oxygen and having purple lips. She's supposed to be on oxygen 24/7 but won't do it. husband was planning on taking her to the doctor tomorrow. Today though, he got over there, her lips are purple again, her speech is slurred, she's swollen and is having problems moving. She protested but he called an ambulance so I'm headed over to the hospital. I'll update later.
  2. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Dang...thats two...doing the pretzel there is no three!
  3. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    I just said prayers.....I have nothing else to say.


    Oh Pootie can't wait to talk to Chester....and Cloe and Lu Lu is so excited to get her first card. OMG they love you so much! Best cards EVER!!!! Pootie won't take her nose out of Chester's card and her paw off the outline. lol.
  4. ThreeShadows

    ThreeShadows Quid me anxia?

    So sorry, 'Stang, please keep us informed.
  5. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    I hope they can stabilize her. I'm so sorry!
  6. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    They are transferring mother in law to a larger hospital in the next town over. She DOES have pneumonia but it doesn't seem to be that bad. Her problem is that she has a bladder infection that seems to have spread to her blood stream somehow. It could be affecting her heart and they are concerned with her renal function also. Plus....she normally sleeps and spends most of her time in a day bed in her living room. It's not uncommon for her to not get up when husband goes to give her her medications. Apparently she hasn't gotten up for a couple of days. She's soaked the bed with urine and also has a few bedsores from laying in it. husband is upset and worried. He SAYS he's upset with mother in law for telling him she's fine and doesn't need to go to the doctor or hospital all week but I know he's also blaming himself. He's going to be even more upset with himself because once the docs get mother in law straightened out, husband is going to have to put her in a nursing home. She can't be by herself anymore and is beyond assisted living at this point. He's always said that when that time comes, it will kill her which in turn will kill him.

    husband is still at home currently. One of his brothers lives a couple of hours away and is on his way. When he gets here they will head up to the hospital. He's debating on staying up there but we'll see how it goes. Thanks for the support and well wishes. I'll update as I get more info.
  7. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    Sepsis (blood poisoning), is sadly not that uncommon in untreated urinary tract infections. I hope in this case it can be treated.

    husband? I worry about that statement....putting his mother in a "home" would kill him when she dies? Pls watch him very carefully.

    You are all in my thoughts.
  8. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    Saying prayers for you all.
  9. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Saying prayers and sending hugs.
  10. WhymeMom?

    WhymeMom? No real answers to life..

    Hoping "her" move goes well......it must be done for everyone's peace of mind!
  11. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    Just to clarify and not worry you...when I say it will kill husband to put her in a nursing home, I mean that it will tear him up. He won't do anything drastic but he will be feeling very guilty about all of it. Yes she's not compliant with medication related things but he'll blame himself for not seeing problems earlier, not getting her in quicker than he did, etc.

    We are at the hospital now. husband and brother in law are back with mother in law now. According to the preliminary report from the nurse, mother in law has (forget how she put it exactly) issues that are exacerbated by her Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) which has caused resp. failure that has in turn affected other organ systems. They are still waiting on the blood cultures taken earlier this afternoon but are continuing the iv antibiotic started at our home hospital. She's on a heavy duty oxygen max that sounds like it's forced air, an iv with a couple of different bags hanging, she's cathed, on the auto blood pressure cuff which she had off and was attempting to take out her iv when we walked in. I have the feeling that she will be in soft cuff restraints before too much longer. She's notorious for removing as much as possible when she's in the hospital.

    I'm probably going to go to her apartment tomorrow after difficult child's court appearance and start cleaning her apartment. husband was going to do it today anyway as it normally needs it but now...it really needs aired out. I doubt mother in law will be going back there again so I might as well get a jump on the cleaning before the odors get too bad. We're going to have to trash her mattress and can always get another one if by some chance she does go home. I don't really see it happening though. husband's paternal grandmother is in a nursing home here so maybe we can get mother in law in the same one. Then again, his grandmother has some senility or alzheimer's issues and doesn't know anyone really anymore but we'll see how it goes.

    Daisylover...I may call you (do I have a current number?) for info on nursing home payment options. Or if there is anyone in IN who has dealt with this too I could use the advice.

    Thanks again for all of your good wishes. I have the feeling we're going to be fairly busy the next few weeks.
  12. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    We're thinking about you 'stang. Do keep us posted
  13. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Sending hugs and prayers for all...
  14. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green


    It's now 10:53pm and we just got home a bit ago. The way it stands as of when we left:

    mother in law is now on a ventilator. Without it, her oxygen numbers aren't where the docs need them to be for surgery. They think there is an issue with her gallblader (swelling and her acid levels in her blood are high) so they are going to do a scope in the morning and possibly surgery depending on what they find. Thus...they need her oxygen up. She is sedated so it shouldn't be too bad for her.

    Also, they are running more tests becase after being on IV's all day, her urine output is far below what it should be so there is concern about renal function.

    Poor husband...now he's second guessing his earlier decision to start looking for a nursing home because of guilt. I think this decision is going to be rougher on him in some ways than losing her period. He's also upset because when the doctor pointed to him and told mother in law to say who he was, she didn't know. I reminded him that at that time, her oxygen was down, she was doped up and also didn't have her glasses on. Under the same circumstances...I probably wouldn't have known who he was either.
  15. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Sending prayers and {{{hugs}}} for mother in law, you and husband.
  16. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    Oy. You guys are still in my thoughts. I hate to see them get sick like this. It is also bringing back memories of the last two weeks of husband's life.

    If you want to PM me to talk; pls feel free to do so.
  17. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh Stang....I really do understand what you guys are going through so well. Tell B that when my numbers were down, I didnt know who my family was! Literally. When I first came out, I didnt remember the grands. How sad is that? It really upset Jamie.

    Urinary Tract Infection (UTI)'s can really reek havoc on the elderly and disabled. I cant tell you how often we had to have Tony's grandmother rushed to the hospital when she was alive because she just seemed "off" and it was an Urinary Tract Infection (UTI). That ended up being what caused her to end up in a rest home.

    B cant have any guilt about his mom. He has done his level best. Its so hard to be the parent to a parent. If she needs to be in a nursing home it will be the best thing for her. She will be better off there and will most likely make friends and have things to do there that she wouldnt have at home. I know I didnt expect my mom to like it (and really I dont know that she could express like but she seemed content) but she was cared for. I saw the residents doing activities and that is what I would look for in a placement.

    Payment can come in the form of medicare and medicaid. Or long term care insurance if you have that. I wouldnt think that his mom had a whole lot in the way of savings considering she was mentally ill. If she was on medicare and medicaid, that will pay for her care. I can tell you what to look for in a home and how to do a visit.
  18. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Yes, UTIs made my Nana jump over the desk at the nurse - the day after her HIP REPLACEMENT surgery. Yeah, not good.
    I hope they figure out what is causing things to fail.

    Janet - I have your #3 if you are referring to hospital admits. Future mother in law went in yesterday for trouble breathing. But, I believe she is being released today. No heart attack or anything new found.
  19. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Lots of hugs... I am sending prayers to you guys, too.