Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by crazymama30, May 14, 2009.

  1. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    So yesterday difficult child had an appointment with psychiatrist, and then I had an appointment with his therapist. I went to pick him up from school, and he was in the office. He had taken a bottle of generic Immodium(pills) to school and was reportedly bragging about it. Principal was not there, so I am expecting a call from the school this morning.

    psychiatrist talked to him about the pill incident, and his fight last week. Somehow psychiatrist thought that he was going to do miracles and get difficult child to admit to having some responisibility for the fight last week. That did not happen, It is all the other kids fault. They were both at fault.

    With the pill incident, difficult child kept changing his story. He did consistently claim that he did not know it was wrong, and I don't know if he did or not. I just cannot believe him anymore.

    psychiatrist said he was concerned over difficult child's inability to take responsibility--Me too!! He said that difficult child's rigid thinking pattern was concerning, and that he was very immature for his age. At this point it was only psychiatrist and I in the room, and I just looked at him and said tell me something I don't know. I told psychiatrist that he may be in fifth grade age wise, but developmentally he is 7 or 8. psychiatrist agreed. We are starting difficult child on Abilify 2mg tonight. He just cannot keep going on the way he is.

    therapist has me a little irked. I think difficult child has her wrapped around his finger. She seems to think all his behaviors are just severe ADHD. Tuesday he was upset, it was his first day back to school after being suspended, he had been arguing with me about everything, I went into the bathroom and he had peed all over the garbage can. She said that it could be due to him being so wound up and not having his medications in his system yet and missing because he cannot pay attention. I finally figure out why I think that is so wrong. difficult child has had ADHD his whole life, in 1st and 2nd grade he could hit the toilet. Statistically, ADHD is supposed to get better in some (not all) as they age and mature. So why in the last 9 months can he not hit the toilet? How does that make sense? What about his lack of empathy? How about his trying to physically intimidate me? That is all due to his lack of self esteem. Oh, whatever.

    I just don't know about her. We will continue on for a while and see. But I really don't know about her.
  2. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Sounds like it's time to find a new therapist. :hammer: What's she thinking?

    Hope the Abilify helps.

  3. aeroeng

    aeroeng Mom of Three

    I hate it when they take all your money and then only tell you the obvious. Like you could possibly have done something about it, if you had only known. I am doing something I brought him here for help! It does not sound like psychiatrist is being very helpful, but matches well my experiences.

    My difficult child went for about 4 years without taking any responsibility. He finally has started showing some remorse and I get an occasional apology. So I do have some hope maturity can help.
  4. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    I'm not sure what therapist is thinking. I am willing to give her awhile longer to figure it out, she has only been in the picture about 4-6 months, and has not seen difficult child in true form. I don't know that she ever will, she always has him one on one and he always does great with that. I am not sure if she will do much good. On the other hand, the time period when she has been seeing him is when he has done his best.

    As for psychiatrist, it does seem stupid for him to tell me what I already know--but I have been saying this for awhile and have been blown off, no one really saw it. It feels good to have him see what I have been seeing and commenting on. I think it really helped that he met with difficult child without me. I try to sit and not interupt difficult child, but he would give a better picture without me there. I do think psychiatrist pushes him more than therapist, if not just for the fact that psychiatrist is male and that alone will give difficult child a different interaction with a person. Gender is way more powerful than we give it credit.
  5. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    About the suddenly missing the toilet... There are 2 possibilities here, something you may want to look at... It could be intentional. He'll never admit it, but...

    Also - difficult child 2 was totally toilet trained. Had accidents upon occasion, but usually when he was under a lot of stress, and not at night. Then BM had him put on Concerta - diagnosed with ADHD - and he turned into an aggressive, whiny brat. Started wetting the bed. And the floor. Weaned him off when husband took over residential - taking him to a neuropsychologist because his symptoms look a lot more like Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) (perhaps Aspie) than ADHD. Anyway, he doesn't wet the bed or the floor anymore, but sometimes misses the toilet. Of course, now he cleans up the floor when he does... After a lot of mornings of having to do it before breakfast... He just does at the time it happens. It's a lot better.