Farmwife
Member
Just another day living with "Eddie Haskel". (hope you guys get the obscure reference) I'm burnt out to put it mildly. Not angry, not having a crisis just got to that calm place where I realized I'm done living the way we have. I am so fed up that I think I have lost my ability to parent effectively or objectively anymore. I am mad, mad about 4 years of abuse. I'm so mad that now what may possibly be average teen behavior leaves me ready to "battle to the death" to regain control of my home with an ODD kid. Like that makes sense lol.
Anywhoo, long story short because you all get what I'm saying...
Does Residential Treatment Center (RTC) actually help difficult child's or is it just a means to get rid of a difficult child? I'm not beyond the point of wanting to just rid myself of my difficult child but it would be nice to pretend to myself that he may get some benefit from placement. (I don't say that lightly by the way) I have pretty much given up hope though. difficult child is smart, he is a con artist extraoridinaire and only accepts help as a means to shut us up, don't think he cares to really change. So, I don't see anyone getting past his mask in a meaningful way.
I realize not all Residential Treatment Center (RTC) are created equal but I just wanted to know if I could imagine him coming home ready to transition from my home at 18 as a better person or if I am just going to restore order in our lives and cut the "dead weight" loose?
I must sound like an awful mother, I'm also sort of beyond caring. *shrug* After 4 years of abuse culminating in blood spattered walls it's sort of hard to inspire that nurturing feeling anymore. I keep "jokingly" telling husband that I should start writing the book now, the book that all my exhaustive notes will turn into a huge check someday. (to charity) The book I write after difficult child "grows up". It's like I see a collection of behaviors and see a very very scary vision of his future, the books title would be something like "A step by step guide on how to raise a killer". There will be a special chapter on animal cruelty followed by a chapter about the failed system. IYKWIM
I'm rambling...lost as I ever was. Too much hurt behind me to feel anything anymore except self preservation.
by the way, for anyone that was following the hospital discharge- Choosing between cost/effectiveness of Residential Treatment Center (RTC) vs. Shared expenses with My Mom to take him in with extra trips to intensive therapy. Neither is affordable so I want the most "bang for my buck".
Anywhoo, long story short because you all get what I'm saying...
Does Residential Treatment Center (RTC) actually help difficult child's or is it just a means to get rid of a difficult child? I'm not beyond the point of wanting to just rid myself of my difficult child but it would be nice to pretend to myself that he may get some benefit from placement. (I don't say that lightly by the way) I have pretty much given up hope though. difficult child is smart, he is a con artist extraoridinaire and only accepts help as a means to shut us up, don't think he cares to really change. So, I don't see anyone getting past his mask in a meaningful way.
I realize not all Residential Treatment Center (RTC) are created equal but I just wanted to know if I could imagine him coming home ready to transition from my home at 18 as a better person or if I am just going to restore order in our lives and cut the "dead weight" loose?
I must sound like an awful mother, I'm also sort of beyond caring. *shrug* After 4 years of abuse culminating in blood spattered walls it's sort of hard to inspire that nurturing feeling anymore. I keep "jokingly" telling husband that I should start writing the book now, the book that all my exhaustive notes will turn into a huge check someday. (to charity) The book I write after difficult child "grows up". It's like I see a collection of behaviors and see a very very scary vision of his future, the books title would be something like "A step by step guide on how to raise a killer". There will be a special chapter on animal cruelty followed by a chapter about the failed system. IYKWIM
I'm rambling...lost as I ever was. Too much hurt behind me to feel anything anymore except self preservation.
by the way, for anyone that was following the hospital discharge- Choosing between cost/effectiveness of Residential Treatment Center (RTC) vs. Shared expenses with My Mom to take him in with extra trips to intensive therapy. Neither is affordable so I want the most "bang for my buck".