difficult child son is 17 now. He spent the beginning of Nov, all of Dec, and a week of Jan. in the Children's Crisis Intervention Unit. Both times he was hospitalized, was within 12 hours after having his girlfriend break up with him. There was one other hospitalization earlier in the year and one trip to the ER but got sent home, all right after having her breaking up with him. difficult child made the varsity soccer team as a freshman. He enjoys soccer tremendously and in Sept. the coach made a comment to him that he felt difficult child would be one of the captains in his senior year. Junior year started well. He was having a great time playing. About 3 weeks into the season, difficult child was talking on the phone with his girlfriend. He had it on speakerphone. I could hear the whole conversation. She was upset that he had practice or a game after school Mon thru Fri and that he didn't get home until between 6 & 6:30. She kept telling him that she wanted to see him right after school. He kept saying that he could see her after soccer and that soccer would be over in Nov. She wanted to break up with him because of this but she then relented. A couple of days later I heard another conversation in which she told him that she was going to be taking dance lessons and her mom was going to let her take them every night of the week. He asked about what time and she said 7 to 9. His response was, now we will never see each other during the week. She replied, well you do soccer and don't care that you don't see me right after school. I guess we will have to break up. So he asked if he gave up soccer would she give up dance. Of course the answer was Yes. It seems she constantly likes to break up with him to have him cry over her and beg her to take him back. She is good to him as well. She does try to talk him into calming down if he's upset over something else, etc. In the most recent hospitalization process, we found that he started self medicating with pot to help cope with stress. During the hospital stay, he told me not to get a phone card for him because he was afraid that he would call her, get upset again because of their breakup, and go into a rage. He did manage to get some minutes from someone else and called a friend. Girlfriend was there and when asked if he wanted to talk to her he said no that he better not. A couple of days later, she winds up real sick and she's texting me on the way to the ER. Her dad starts texting me and mentions that she is very upset that difficult child won't speak to her and that she is so sick (ulcers that she had before meeting him). She acted like she was the victim. Because of the self medicating issue he has to attend a dual diagnosis program 4 times a week after school thru 7:45 (one of the nights is until 9). He just started Monday. On our way there yesterday, she breaks up with him because her dad will only let her see him 1 time between Fri, Sat, & Sun and she can see him after school Mon thru Thurs. She felt that seeing him for only an hour after the program wasn't good enough. difficult child became hysterical crying and telling me that he was not going to the program and wanted to go home right away and talk to her. I explained that he was court ordered to be there. He text messaged her and she still wouldn't budge. He kept crying that she didn't understand and I, myself, could not understand everything because of his crying. I had it and asked to speak to her. I asked her what was going on. When she stated that with the program 4 nights a week she won't get to see him, I said and you just got a job you start soon, right after school for 5 days a week so what's the difference? I said and what about the weekends? She said that she could only see him one time. With that I said OK then and hung up. Now she went and told her parents that I yelled at her and had an attitude. So they said that she can't come here anymore and that I am a horrible person. My son is mad at me because I meddled and he'll never get her back. I admit I was frustrated when I spoke to her but she pulled this while we are driving there. I needed to know what exactly was happening so I could calm my difficult child down enough to convince him to go to the program. This program is to help him cope plus it is court ordered. She knew full well that breaking up with him would upset him. I felt like she was deliberately making him upset because she wanted her way and she wasn't getting it. Am I a meddling mom and a horribe person? Do I owe her an apology since she feels I yelled at her?