Did I go overboard???

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by ksm, Dec 14, 2011.

  1. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    OK, I have had a few converstations with the school nurse about difficult child reqesting tylenol for headaches several times a week. Well, this weekend after a meltdown, difficult child told me that there are a group of girls that are bullying her. I guess dating back to the first week of school, one girl said "your voice is so irritating it sounds like a puppy is being killed" Now a group of girls are calling her The Puppy Killer.

    I shared that last year, when we had problems, I talked to the 7th grade counselor and before the day was over, difficult child and several girls were called to her office. I didn't expect her to have a one on one... I thought she would talk to difficult child, and give her ways to handle things. So difficult child doesn't want to repeat that - it just made things worse the rest of the year - and the girls would only do it when no adults were around.

    Then I talked to the school counselor (mentioned the above info) and told her that we need help - like a 504 or IEP plan. That she is struggling in school, and I have been tyring to get help since 4th grade. She said that we need to wait until we get the school testing done - and she saw the school psychologist today and psychiatrist said she hadn't received my letter. I am royally ticked. I explained that I hand delivered it to her office last week! So, counselor asked me to email her and attach the letter.

    I did. Then I made 3 copies, took two to the school - one for the counselor, one for the psychiatrist. Then I drove over to the psychiatrist office, left ANOTHER letter there. Then I had the secretary give me a written note that I had brought the letter in, dated and signed the note that I am now keeping.

    Then I emailed the psychiatrist, attached the letter, and gave her a small vent that my requests for help has been ignored for the last 4 years. That the school, the mental health agency, and the insurance provider have all dragged their feet, and now we are all waiting for school testing.

  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Certified letter, with signed acknowledgement returned.
    There is no other proof of delivery.

    I understand the frustration with trying to get anyone to do anything...
    Also understand that... if you DON'T speak up, the bullying will get worse; if you DO speak up, it will get worse before it gets better, but you have to keep speaking up. been there done that. But you DO have to get difficult child on-side with that.
  3. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Your lawyer would love you....if you ever get to that point. NOT over the top, just doin' what cha gotta do..... good job
  4. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    Thanks, Buddy and InsaneCd. Last week, I went to a grocery store that had a customer service desk that used to do postal stuff. Now all that they do is sell stamps. It was late in the day, so I thought mailing it would be better than waiting another day to get to the post office. It is a small town, and things are usually delivered the next day. But the next day, I got the letter back because the stamp I had bought fell off. So I just got in the car and drove it to her office.

    Her secretary said it was probably still in her inbox. So now there will be two... and one in her email... and one that the councelor will forward... and one from the school secretary will put in the inner school delivery.

    Now that I am riled up - I am calling the insurance company. Have to channel my rage. KSM
  5. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Not over the top at all. When I wrote letters, I hand delivered AND sent it certified registered receipt.

    Yes, we have to be that paranoid because it's very easy for those whose help we require to say "Oh, I never received _____________". And just like you, when I sent a letter, I copied in everyone I could think of that may have a mutual interest in my child's educational career (teachers, principal, superintendent, school psychiatric, therapist/psychiatrist, everyone I could think of!).

    It's not overboard at all! And if someone tells you that you went overboard, such as a school staff, ask them what they would do if they had been requesting assistance for their child for three years without any viable response and/or solution??? Grrrr.
  6. jal

    jal Member

    Definately not!. First time I sent a filled out form from SD website. Never got a response and didn't know about cert. mail @ the time. I became the squeaky wheel until Director of Special Education hand wrote out the form with me on the other end of the phone. I too, live in a small town. After that I've never had trouble with-the SD and difficult child has an IEP, private placement and private transportation all funded by SD.

    Keep on them!
  7. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    Just got a call from school counselor and she couldn't open my email attachment - but then she found the one I had dropped off for her (I didn't tell her about the other two copies!) Anyway, the school psychiatric has a form I have to sign giving her permission for testing. So I will stop at the school and sign that form. Geesh. Two weeks to get to this point. KSM
  8. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Bullying issues shouldn't have to wait until testing is done. And yes, it gets worse before it gets better. Those girls sound really nasty.

  9. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    OK I went in to the school at the end of the school day yesterday to sign the release form for testing - and instead of signing a form - I was given a whole packet of papers to read and complete. Guess that is my job today. difficult child stayed up until 11pm trying to finish a report. She thought two hours would give her time to finish... well, it was more life 5 hours. and she still has to do the power point part of it. I don't know if the teacher will allow any more time or not. That is why I am trying to get help from the school like 501 or IEP. But she was at least pleasant and apologetic yesterday. KSM