difficult child has been on probation since last august and was doing okay for a couple of months until mid January when he was supposed to go to school for the spring semester. Instead, he left home and told me he was staying with a girlfriend. I wanted to believe him, but in my mind i knew he was lying. Instead i came to learn that he was spending time with a 28 year old drug dealer and his crew. Because he was reporting to his Po and doing what he was supposed to do, i let it play out hoping that he would come to his senses and leave the group. I begged him on the phone several times to leave and promised to help him find a job but he refused, and left with nothing to do, continued working on detachment and praying for the best. Last Thursday night, i got a collect call at 1.30 am from the local police station. difficult child had been arrested with the drug dealer. Apparently, they were walking towards an apartment building in our town and somebody had called the cops because there was an incident in the area. difficult child and his accomplice were stopped by the one of the cops who had answered the call but instead of stopping they walked away. The cop went after them and did a search difficult child was found carrying 50-70 Percocet pills. The following morning, he was told to report to probation and the Po violated him and he was taken to jail. Now he is facing a new charge and the violation which might lead to him being locked up for more time. He has a hearing on the 4th of April. Since he has been in jail, he doesn't want anything to do with me. I think he blames me for god knows what. The same night he was arrested, i had talked to him at 6.00 pm trying to get through to him and telling him that being around the people he was with would not end up well. Therefore,in his warped up mind, he thinks i might have called the cops on them. I was doing better on detachment and now i find myself with the same guilt and wondering how i could have raised a child with no common sense. I know very well the pills belonged to the dealer who is known in the area for dealing and who obviously is clever enough to use a handy boy like my son knowing full well of what would happen if they are caught. This is the second time that difficult child has landed in jail because he can't see when he is being used. I feel like crying and shouting at the same time when i think of how far he has fallen. I would like to help him by retaining a lawyer who can keep him out of jail while he fights the possession charge, but he doesn't want to see me. I am not among the people who can visit him in jail and i don't know whom he has listed, but i am thinking the same kids he was hanging out with. Right now he has a court appointed attorney who doesn't have a good record and might not be able to keep him out. I am so conflicted and asking myself, " how do i look the other way and do nothing while i know deep down my difficult child is just a naive man-child who has been messed up by pot and right now doesn't even realize he is headed to jail? It is very hard.