Do YOU feel smothered?


Well-Known Member
I dunno......just a feeling, I guess. husband and difficult child seem like they can't do a THING without me. They are both up my nose all the time. For instance, I work on-call for an investment company and I've worked this week. It's only occasionally and parttime, but the two of them had to drive over to the city where I was bring me a Coke. *SIGH*.....I can't even get away from them by working a little. I wish I could feel like it was sweet and kind of them, but instead I feel smothered. They are both so needy all the time. At this very moment, difficult child is sitting beside me on the sofa (laptop in hand) with his head on my shoulder (just to touch me).....and he's ELEVEN!!!! When do they grow up?


Well-Known Member
I constantly feel this way.

My kids are grown and I feel this way. I was complaining about this fact to my T the other day because I have felt that with oldest back home I have lost my safe haven in my room. Someone is always over my shoulder. I have no peace.
difficult child 1 (Basset Hound) used to do that. All the way up until she was like, 15. I'd be sitting there, doing bills or something, and she'd be sitting next to me, rubbing my arm, giving me the puppy dog eyes (thus the nickname). I could not get over the jealousy when Pixie was born! There is a 13 year difference between the two of them. Basset Hound would follow me around while I was trying to get Pixie to burp or stop crying, telling me she loved me.

Then she turned 16. Meh, she didn't much want anything to do with me after that.

Marcie Mac

Just Plain Ole Tired
I can totally relate. With my SO's illness, he is not to be left alone at all in case of an attack. He comes to work with me, he comes to my business meetings whereever they may be. I got away for a weekend without him one time in the past 8 years, and arranged for the kids to be with him. And recently developed heart problems on top of the other stuff, I have been sleeping with one eye open as he is now a walking time bomb.

Then put difficult child in the mix when he has a bout of anxiety calling every 10 minutes for me to come home, I need to come home, can you come home now.

Even my three dogs are needy - when I do get home, they just have to try and lay all over me - the 10 pound one I don't mind, the two 100 plus pound ones get a bit much. I can't even go into the bathroom or take a shower, and they plop down outside till I am done, then follow me around till I decide to sit down again, and here they come. I know how Bo Peep felt.

I am so looking forward to this weekend when 7 living here is reduced back to 4 again. I think its as close to "alone" as I am going to get..



I've always said that if difficult child could crawl back inside me she would. Some days it becomes too much and I'll tell her she can sit by me, but I just don't want to be touched. It's not that I'm withholding affection because I don't do that, but because she'll hang on me and I just *need* a bit of space. On those days, I can't stand the animals on me either. My animals are needy, too. I seem to have a knack for finding the neediest of creatures and bringing them home.

Marcie - one of my cats, if not allowed in the bathroom with me, will reach under the door and pull the rug completely out of the bathroom. Just a tad co-dependent.

timer lady

Queen of Hearts
The role of wife & mother is highly under appreciated. Just the other day I had husband on one side of me & kt on the other, asking for clarification of the house rules.

I looked at husband & about blew a gasket. He & I sat down & worked out the household routine & what is expected of each member of this family.

I told husband that he's the adult - fix it! And he did.

Pamela - totally understand. I'm stunned that I'll find kt on my one side and husband, Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) worker or PCA on the other waiting for "mom's final judgment". These people need to get a grip.


Well-Known Member
Do you ever want to just yell....."GET AWAY FROM MEEEEEEEEE"?

I swear, the two of them went to the grocery this morning (I hate the grocery) and would you believe they had to call me...TWICE? ARGGGGGGGGGG>>>>>>>>>>>>


Active Member
I feel that way too. I work in healthcare with elderly (often lonely) and have a family that NEEDS me. I just want to not be needed. A vacation camping trip by myself in the mountains sounds wonderful. No phones,computers, or humans allowed.


Well-Known Member
Awww I think that is so sweet. I would love for my difficult child to want to sit next to me with her head on my shoulder. She has never been one for physical affection from us, any boy she can find, but not us.

To drive all the way out to give you a coke, gotta libe it. Mine wouldn't even go to the refrigerator to get me one.