You know Jena
When I was your PCs age, I went through a very similar situation. I was the perfect student and perfect kid, until one day, I just sorta snapped. Probably puberty, hanging out with the wrong crowd, wanting my independence, etc. I started smoking pot, and sleeping with guys, lying, all that jazz. The entire time, I pushed my parents, farther and farther away from me, which caused my parents to yell and punish me more and more. I felt so alone, and so scared. I did not know what was happening to me - all I knew was that I felt different.
Well, one day, in the middle of one of these show downs with my parents I told them I wanted to kill myself. The truth of the matter was that I did feel that, but I did not have a plan, or a true desire to do it - I just wanted out of the situation I was in.
Well, my parents freaked. They told me that I was going to go get a psychiatric exam, which was actually a lie. They tricked me into hospitalization. I was dropped at an office door, thinking it was just like a 2 day stay and hours later I was told that I would be there TWO YEARS. This was in 1983 where being in a hospital for that long was the norm. It was not an Residential Treatment Center (RTC), and this hospital still exist today, only the are now practicing the standard 7-10 days. Anyway I flipped my lid when I was told two years......... I was not allowed any, ANY telephone contact. I could only write letters. And the level of illness of the girls I was with was horrific. Anyway, I could go on and on about how this scarred me - and how abusive that place was - but that is not the point.
The point is that had my parents done what you are doing with easy child my WHOLE life would have changed. If they had just connected with this lost scared kid, hugged her, gotten me therapy, reassured me it was all going to be OK - (and the huge thing that
you are doing) TALK to me, not yelled, my entire life would have taken a different path.
I am SO glad that your easy child is talking to you, that she knows you and husband love her - that is the most important piece to this entire puzzle - kudos for making it so for your child.
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