sorry i'm eating up the boards, gotta go somewhere with it........ or i'll explode. i feel a little bit calmer right now. i was dreading the talk. it was very calm actually. long story short she's moving out on saturday. i didnt' want difficult child to be here and see it. i told difficult child and easy child did also. she said she can't comply with the rules, some other parents taking her in. she wont' tell me who. i'm covered, told school what's going on, have therapists bcking. anyway that's that.she said if i keep going to therapy will you pay for it, i said yes i will. she asked can i come over two nights a week for dinner and i want to see difficult child. i said we'll c call me if i'm around. she said you aren't going to make this normal? i said normal? there's nothing normal about a 17 year old in your current shape moving out. she said your going to make this as hard as possible aren't you? i said no, we';d love you to stay yet if you can't comply with these rules than your making the choice to leave. we are in no way asking you to leave. it's just toxic, we're all hurting and it needs to stop now. she asked are you goign to let me work in the store? i said no we have no rm for you right now. you have to get your own job, we'll cover the financial aid so you can start college if that's what you chose to do. so thats' that. no yelling or screaming, or carrying on. she said well sat. should work i have to make some calls and make sure that works. i said no problem. she said can i leave my dresser and bed? i said yes you can. she said how can i afford to do anything? i said i dont' know this is your choice your making now you have to figure it out, thats part of the ugly side of being an adult. i told her i love you and if you do change your mind we'll be here, yet only if you can comply with the rules we've written out i'll let you keep them. so i'm proud of me i didn't throw up or have a heart attack lol. i stayed calm, didnt' cry she started to water up a bit. giong to take difficult child down road now to get a snack and than i'm going to watch a movie. thanks guys without venting here i wouldnt' of been able to handle that talk.