Ache's sick leave continues and he is at home and his girlfriend visited last weekend. They have been together couple years now and it has always been long distance relationship and still is. She is a great young woman and I absolutely love her. She is also very good to Ache and I can't imagine how Ache would survive if she left him. And I basically told her to cut her losses and run. I was having sauna with her, and our conversation turned quite intimate and profound like it often happens in sauna. It is just something in sitting naked right next to other naked person in dimly lit hot room, not having to look at them while talking and very slow natural flow of the conversation, which you can easily slow down even more, if you want more time to think before saying something and being so relaxed that always seems to take conversations to other level. But anyway we were talking about life and dreams and goals and she started to talk about her relationship to Ache. She loves him a lot, can't imagine loving someone else the same way, but she also understands that Ache is troubled. That he may never turn out to be a man, that could be a true life partner to her. I quite straightforwardly told her, that while right now relationship with Ache is not hindering her or keeping her back and while she may not find another guy that would feel as extraordinary to her than Ache, though that is unlikely too, when she is ready to move on, take a next step in her life, Ache may never turn out to be a guy she needs next to her. That while loving someone is a great thing, it is not enough and not something you can build your life on alone. I couldn't say anything else. It is bad enough what may happen to my boy, but taking down other extraordinary kid with him is not something I could stomach. But still. He is my son and if or when girlfriend leaves him, all heck will break loose. I'm sick in my stomach on what I said and even more so, that it really is how I see things now. It is very hard to accept that my extraordinary boy seems to be so damaged, so disabled, that he is not good enough any more to other extraordinary young people even in his mother's eyes.