LOL! I didn't realize it would be taken that way. No, he's not part of the, ahem, equation. In fact, he's pretty cozy with-my former best friend ... the one I've written about here before, but who has no kids and with-whom I've stopped confiding about difficult child. She is funny and fun, but since I've gotten more into the family with-chauffering and activities, I'm not her type of fun any more. And she's racist. And she has a nasty temper. So if B can put up with-her and be my buffer, all the better. This keeps us all in the equation.
I do not know if she knows that I am looking for a new place, but she does know that I am the type to take things slowly. And so does he. I like to make plans. (You don't get to this age with-o making long-term plans.
)
Yes, I will take difficult child VERY part time ... and that is part of my plan. At this age, it is time for husband to step up to the plate. difficult child is becoming a man and he has GOT to have a man around. I am tired of calling my friends, B included, to come and bail me out and do what husband should be doing, in my book. It is not helping difficult child at all to be surrounded by middle aged women when he needs guy mentors.
This will force husband to spend more time with-difficult child.
Or ... it could go down badly.
That's why I'm taking my time. I have to put a lot more things in place than just the apt.
I'm not even telling easy child until I sign on the dotted line.
The main thing is that I know that my cousin, P, will not be around for more than another yr or two, and that will give me a lot more freedom to paint and write and generally get my wits about me. It has also made a diff since my dad died, because I was flying to MN a lot over the past half doz yrs. The good part of that is that he was a LOT easier to care for than either P or difficult child so it actually gave me a break.
Originally, the plan was for me to go away for a cpl nights every mo, to get a break from difficult child. But that has gone by the wayside. And husband is not exactly Johnny on the Spot. He'll take difficult child to a movie, or do a movie at home on Fri nights, and go to a counseling session 2X a mo, and have difficult child pick up branches or pinecones in the yard on Sundays, but everythng else comes from me.
It's tiring, as you all know.
And it takes its toll on a relationship.
I don't know if I answered all of your questions, but suffice to say, this is a slow process, so don't panic!
