For those with husband's who are unemployed and not seeking jobs aggresively...

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by DDD, Apr 21, 2011.

  1. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I happened to watch Dr. Phil last night and the topic was unemployed underearning husbands. I'm not sure how many of you...but a know more than a couple have complained (or vented) that your husband's are not aggresively seeking employment. So I'm sharing this program in hopes that you computer savvy people can access the show that I saw last night.

    Two or three couples were featured. The husband's used the internet to seek out work opportunities and, often, spent alot of time playing computer games or whatever in lieu of heading out the door looking for work. There was a guest on Dr. Phil who has written a book that was highly regarded. Dr. Phil encouraged everyone to read it.

    The bottom line of the program, as I saw it, was that internet searches for jobs are not often productive. A major point was that resumes are not written in the right way...and there are explanations of how to improve in the book. The "biggie" (to me) was that you have to go out in person and seek employment on a one on one basis. If I heard correctly ?? the goal should be to meet small business employers in person and be prepared to "sell" our strong points in relation to their business.

    I can't remember exactly which of you are in this position. My gut says at least three or four. If you are sharp at internet searches etc. I hope you can get this program and give your husband's some positive input and support. I found it to be very interesting and it just "made sense" to me. DDD
  2. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Makes sense to me too........and I've been encouraging husband to get "out there" and beat the pavement the tried and true way.

    I see him getting motivated about the time he has to do without something he enjoys. lol (it's not really funny but you know what I mean)

    He never fails to suddenly find work when his benefits are about to run out.........however, he's never been 63 before either. ugh
  3. skeeter

    skeeter New Member

    if serious - one should approach unemployment AS a job. Get up the same time every day. Get dressed. Have a game plan of visiting XX places, follow up XX places, call XX places, etc. If your skills need improving, set that time aside, too. Our library has some great free online classes on everything from basic college classes to computer classes to keyboarding.
    When my ex (wasn't the ex then) came home laid off, I was back to work (after 8 years of being a stay at home mom) in 10 days. Called everyone I knew and got back into the workforce at a temp agency, and was eventually rehired. He sat home and did nothing much until his unemployment was due to run out.
  4. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Although we haven't lived with this issue I found that the expert did a logical editing and revamp of the resume one man was sending out...mostly via the net. The suggestions on how to present yourself, what topics to feature in your interviews etc. were all really positive. I hope it helps some CD family. DDD
  5. ML

    ML Guest

    Count me in. In order to survive I've given up retirement to lessen our monthly expenses and I'm started to resent that husband isn't showing more motivation towards finding employment. I will say that on the plus side he has taken on a lot of stuff around the house but I can work circles around him in the home and would much prefer he bring in a paycheck.
  6. shellyd67

    shellyd67 Active Member

    My husband is the opposite ... LOL He is a true workaholic. We own a small business and he just LOVES to work.

    He does take time off to coach difficult child's baseball team and is more available to us now then when he worked for someone else.

    husband's dad beat it in his head WORK, WORK, WORK !!! Thankfully, in this economy our business is thriving and he has a place to go everyday.

    I feel for those who pound the pavement and are unable to find work. It is tough out there !
  7. Star*

    Star* call 911

    I have and did do this - I'm feeling VERY defeated at the moment. I don't know if it's my age - or that I'm a woman, or what it is. I know there are woman truck drivers out there - I SEE THEM -

    I am so sick and tired of "We really need someone with at least XX years experience." sigh - I'm not giving up but wow - this is NOT what the brochure said. And I'm not thrilled at taking a job that keeps me away from home 14 days at a time - There is no way DF can manage the house and bills. I need a home every night job - and they told me this was possible when I took the course. UGH. My last interview - I got everything the guy said to have, I was there on time, i waited, waited, and finally the guard in the shack said - OH yeah....he can't make it - wants you to reschedule tomorrow. I thought ARE YOU KIDDING? He had my number gets me to drive 20 miles out of my way and can't even call me? No thanks. This is how I'm treated before I'm even hired, I can't imagine how he treats drivers who work here. I'll pass.

    I may just take a PT job at Home Depot or something. This drags. Oh and to be sure I can't complain about not being Bi-Lingual? I'm taking a Spansih Class. lol. Ole!
  8. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Starbie, both my bros are truckers...........and both are finding jobs hard to come by. Not to mention gas is a killer right now.

    One bro is mucking stalls, literally, between hauling jobs just to keep his horses fed and stabled. Horses would be sold except they are the tried and true motivation for his difficult child daughter. He recently moved in with my mom. Which tells ME how bad it's gotten for him. He's not lived at home since 14 and he is anything but lazy, even if he is a reformed difficult child.

    Older bro......I think he's counting on current wife/girlfriend to fill in the gaps on his paycheck until she sends him packing. He's had so many wives/gfs I stopped keeping track of their names about 10 yrs ago. lol He also isn't lazy though.

    So if they ain't haulin' business is bad. ugh

    And local hauling is hard to get, even when business is good.

    Hope you find somethin soon..........then when bro calls me about this really funny whacky lady he met who's huge on donkeys I can say well phhht I know HER. Don't mess with that warrior mom. :winks: