Guilty Mom

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by Guilty Mom, Nov 21, 2017.

  1. Guilty Mom

    Guilty Mom New Member

    Ok so we have changed our locks on our home so that our 34 year old son cannot enter. He has been sleeping different places. Naturally it makes me uneasy to think of him and where he might be staying. He has only been out of our home for one week. The reason I am writing is that he works nearby and came by today to eat lunch. He has started a new job and seems to be having issues with coworkers. I really want to know if he has taken something or appears strange...I don't know. He started taking drugs at age 17. Is it possible that he has damaged himself with drugs or do you feel he is taking something. He can always get a job but at some point he messes up and unemployed. I could really use some feedback from those of you that are or have experienced this. Of course holidays are usually hard for all of us.
     
  2. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    GM;

    What would make you feel he has stopped using? Don't rely on him to tell you so. If my kid is in my home i warrant drug testing, if he isn't clean he isn't here. I will meet him for a meal or a coffee just not high in my home.

    Depending upon the drugs he has used, how much and how often there can indeed be some damage physically and mentally. thi can often improve with the cessation of drugs.

    Yes Holidays are difficult indeed.
     
  3. Guilty Mom

    Guilty Mom New Member

    Ok having rough times Amy basic messsge is how and when to make my son move out of our home. As I stated before he can always get a job but soon messed up and let go. He started a great job about a month ago. Has been doing well but there are nights like last night he went to a friends and didn’t come home. Missed his medication taken at night for Schizoaffective disorder bipolar type. He became involved in drugs when he was seventeen. Our world has always Matt. I am to the point that I am nervous and sick just thinking about what is next.he is 34 and we have enabled all these years getting out of jail and never letting him feel the consequences I feel if we had reacted differently things may have turned out better.
    I really don’t enjoy him leaving with us but can imagine life on the streets. I feel real sick, having tight chest. When he had lived away he things rapidly go down hill. Please give me some thought on how to move him out of our home. Sorry to vent but I know many of you have trabled this road.
     
  4. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Your son has a serious psychiatric diagnosis. How about trying to find him a place to stay for the mentally ill, a group home. Is he on Disability? That would help. He would have a case manager and Medicare/Medicaid. A caseworker comes with Disability. A caseworker will help him. He needs to shift his dependence on you to learning to live without you.

    No matter how sick he is, he can't live with you forever so at 34 it is best he learn to navigate the system now. We will all die. Then, if he is overly dependent on living with you, what will happen? Nobody else will let a grown man live off them. Think about if you were gone now. What would your son do? One day this will happen.

    I wish you good luck!
     
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  5. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    I agree with SWOT it is hard for me to address issue as it is different f on my own.

    SWOT has an adult child with a disability and she has manage do parent him to independence. I beleive that is an important and doable goal.

    Is there any way he medication he takes could be given Intradermal as this is a long term dose approach and would last a month or so before needing to be repeated.

    You are not alone. Remember the past does not predict the future and you can do a lot to insure your son becomes independent. We will not be here forever.
    I am not in the US so I can not advise on how to manage the medical system for the help you need. SWOT and others can help you with this.