oh, as to not always getting green, it can happen. Q does ok with it now. But we worked on it systematically and in a fun way, never just you get what you get because he first had to learn tolerance of not having his plan altered (that really is the problem, they are so stuck...so until that mental flexibility is learned it is pretty much a set up for a meltdown to just roll with it)....
I do think it is important to work on it though. There are many ways to do that. Including having things of mixed colors, or first X color then green, etc. But only at times when you mean to work on it until that flexibility is much more comfortable.
I replied to another of your posts before I saw this and was thinking Autism Spectrum from your hand movement description, now I see here other characteristics. Have you ever thought of just going straight to a child development/autism clinic to see what they think? It is SUPER scary (some day I will let you know about how I worked at one and still argued when they thought my kid had autism)...but it sure opens doors for many therapies. For us it also opens up county services and funding.
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