hello everyone, i am new here looking for support and wisdom. i have a son who is 28 yrs old and has lived out of my house more than in my house since he was 19. he is currently living in another state for the last 5 yrs. until i was able to break out of my denial, i enabled him just enough to squeak by and at times i was completely obsessed and enmeshed in the outcome of his decisions. almost a year ago, i finally was able to see my part in this dysfunctional dance and ejected myself from that role completely. he has been jobless, homeless, hopeless and without means. it has broken me down, to the point of total surrender. He had been in denial of his drinking issues for many years up until today. he messaged me and asked if i could provide him with the aa meetings in his area. I sent him the links for the meetings in his town and then had a very open conversation about how he is struggling in all areas of his life. he hasnt actually said it, but he keeps telling me how he wishes he was here with his family who he loves and misses terribly and that he needs to get away from all of the neg influences of where he currently lives. my heart aches. i want to bring him home and take care of him. then at the same time, i know that he must do this on his own. he needs to bloom where hes planted. i am reaching out for some support thanks so much everyone.