It has been awhile since I have been here. difficult child has been living with his bio dad since Dec. He had an altercation with husband and had him arrested and bio dad bailed him out and took care of things. Now speed things up 7 months later difficult child is now back with me. He had an argument with his bio dad about a cell phone and unjustly kicked difficult child out. It appears difficult child has made some changes. He has been clean since Dec. He had a job with a new one lined up, however due to moving back with me couldn't take the other one. He is planning on joining the Army in a couple months. He turns 18 in Sept. He has had a really nice girlfriend for almost a year now. Quite frankley, she is his best decision.
The problem comes in with my husband he is harrassing me about difficult child being back home. I can understand the fear because I am still quit fearful myself. But he just doesn't ease up and it is making me crazy. I also have a real problem with the fact that he does not take any responsibility for his part in difficult child behavior and his influence over him. husband has smoked pot and difficult child has known this for quit some time. difficult child's bio dad was a crack addict many years ago. So hear are the two mean in his life. husband does not think him smoking pot was really a big deal. Last year husband found out difficult child was smoking again and he thought that maybe is he smoked with him and could control the situation and also that they would quit together. Well when the time came to quit difficult child did not. Well much to my dismay neither did husband. Because the night of the altercation difficult child was caught crawling out of our closet looking for husband stash and when confronted he punched husband. This makes me furious. Now all husband does is put the pressure on me to get difficult child out of the house. To me what he has done is just as bad to me and I can forgive him. All this child has ever wanted was to be accepted by the dad's in his life. His bio dad who treats his like garbage thinking its for his own good. Or a step father who is going to hold a grudge for him for the rest of his life and neither one of them think they are wrong in their dealings. I know difficult child has done some horrible things but for once I feel he is trying to make some changes and move forward for his future. Its not like its been a couple weeks its been seven months. I really just need some insight maybe I am in denial. I don't know.
Thanks,
JMS
The problem comes in with my husband he is harrassing me about difficult child being back home. I can understand the fear because I am still quit fearful myself. But he just doesn't ease up and it is making me crazy. I also have a real problem with the fact that he does not take any responsibility for his part in difficult child behavior and his influence over him. husband has smoked pot and difficult child has known this for quit some time. difficult child's bio dad was a crack addict many years ago. So hear are the two mean in his life. husband does not think him smoking pot was really a big deal. Last year husband found out difficult child was smoking again and he thought that maybe is he smoked with him and could control the situation and also that they would quit together. Well when the time came to quit difficult child did not. Well much to my dismay neither did husband. Because the night of the altercation difficult child was caught crawling out of our closet looking for husband stash and when confronted he punched husband. This makes me furious. Now all husband does is put the pressure on me to get difficult child out of the house. To me what he has done is just as bad to me and I can forgive him. All this child has ever wanted was to be accepted by the dad's in his life. His bio dad who treats his like garbage thinking its for his own good. Or a step father who is going to hold a grudge for him for the rest of his life and neither one of them think they are wrong in their dealings. I know difficult child has done some horrible things but for once I feel he is trying to make some changes and move forward for his future. Its not like its been a couple weeks its been seven months. I really just need some insight maybe I am in denial. I don't know.
Thanks,
JMS