These adult children are exhausting. My son reached out to me after almost 5 years of no contact and I responded as if we had spoken yesterday. His long time partner had died in her sleep, I know he is devastated, I understand his pain. I was there immediately for him. I do love my son very much. Of course, as expected, the money requests started almost immediately. They revert back into old habits extremely fast. I bought him prescription eye glasses, clothes, met him in a city and paid for expensive dinners, etc. I try to help without enabling. He is working when they have the jobs. I will not give him money. So, once again, he has disappeared and will not answer my messages or calls for 3 months. I have left messages weekly and he has not responded. His sister has cancer, surgery was this AM, chemo will follow very soon. I left him a message and said please let me know if you get this. No response. Do I try to track him down? not sure really how to find him, at what point do we I just let them go? I realize my son is an addict/alcoholic, but, I am exhausted. My life could make a Nicholas Sparks' novel look light hearted lol! Do I try to track him down?