OnBehalfOfGFGs
New Member
I understand everyone reading this thread is a parent. I started reading these to know how my parents would feel when they find out I have committed credit card fraud against them. One for 800 and another for 3,000 and I think this is the last straw. Yes this was not the first time. I need to get this off my chest. I need advice.I need help. So I want to begin by saying that I am the worst daughter ever. I feel so horrible for what I have done to my parents. I have stolen money from my parents on several occasions thousands of dollars. But I think this last straw will be when they find out I maxed out two credit cards I put in their names. I started stealing money when I was very young, it began as 10bucks and then grew with my age. when I was 18 in college I stole 2 grand from my father he found out and forgave me. I'm not on drugs, I am however dropped out of school. I'm 22 years old. My parents were strict with me growing up. I didnt go many places or have many friends. There were no bad influences. Everything was me, me on my own. Sometimes I feel like there is an evil spirit in me. I love my parents. They work hard, they are all I have, I dont know why I continue to betray them. I finally have been completely honest with them and have been living back home working two jobs and paying off my debts for 2 months straight. I found God again. I go to church every Sunday and I hope to meet and marry a God fearing man some day. The only thing I didnt tell them about was the credit card debts. I figured if I just work and pay it off, by the time they find out it will be paid off and they wont be as mad. But my Dad got a letter in the mail saying his account is delinquent. And now I think he is suspicious. They finally have given me another chance and now what I did back in August is catching back up with me. I think I will be ruined if he finds out its me before I pay it off. I wouldnt even want to see the heartbreak in his eyes. I hope he gets angry and beats me because that would be better than forgiving me and allowing me to live in their house longer, I dont deserve it. I cant deal with this pain in my heart anymore. A part of me wants them to press charges against me. Maybe going to jail is what I need. But then the other part of me doesnt want a felony on my record, I'll never be able to have a decent job or leave the country to travel, not even vote. Should I ruin my whole life over 4 thousand dollars....
I feel horrible. I contemplate suicide all the time. Why should I live? I obviously lack the ability to take care of myself without using the people who love me. I do have dreams. But with all this on my mind I cant. I dont know what to do...Let me add that when I first got the cards I had a job and was in school, I needed the money to get on my feet. Buy things for my apt and what not. My parents refused to ever give me money again cause I just got in trouble for a DUI and they didnt want me moving out and risk getting in trouble again. But I couldnt live in my parents house. They were too strict. At 22 years old they still tell me when to go to bed. They still moniter the type of TV shows that I am allowed to watch, and by the way they are immigrants, I dont wanna say where from but lets just say I'm the first generation of my family to not have an accent.....I deviate though.....Side note: I always planned on paying it off before they noticed but then I lost the job and my grades slipped and my world started crumbling. So I moved back home and here I am. I wish I could go back in time....
I just had to get this off my chest....If I dont commit suicide, I will die of hypothermia form sleeping outside....
I feel horrible. I contemplate suicide all the time. Why should I live? I obviously lack the ability to take care of myself without using the people who love me. I do have dreams. But with all this on my mind I cant. I dont know what to do...Let me add that when I first got the cards I had a job and was in school, I needed the money to get on my feet. Buy things for my apt and what not. My parents refused to ever give me money again cause I just got in trouble for a DUI and they didnt want me moving out and risk getting in trouble again. But I couldnt live in my parents house. They were too strict. At 22 years old they still tell me when to go to bed. They still moniter the type of TV shows that I am allowed to watch, and by the way they are immigrants, I dont wanna say where from but lets just say I'm the first generation of my family to not have an accent.....I deviate though.....Side note: I always planned on paying it off before they noticed but then I lost the job and my grades slipped and my world started crumbling. So I moved back home and here I am. I wish I could go back in time....
I just had to get this off my chest....If I dont commit suicide, I will die of hypothermia form sleeping outside....