I feel like I'm being made fun of because I am fat

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Californiablonde, Dec 6, 2016.

  1. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    I have a jar of nuts, a small bag of croutons for when I make my salads for lunch, herbal tea, and a box of granola bars on my desk at work. Last week, a coworker came by, looked at my desk, pointed at me and laughed, and told my supervisor, "Haha she has food on her desk" I know what she was really thinking. "Look at the fat girl and all her food." I am sure my supervisor thinks the same thing. Remember, she called me fat last year and made me cry, and didn't even apologize for it.

    Anyway, today my supervisor tells me some "anonymous" person complained about my food so I have to hide it. Granted, food on a desk may look a little unprofessional, so I agreed and put it all in one of the empty drawers. Still, I feel like I am being laughed at and even discriminated against because I am so fat.

    When I first started this job 11 years ago, I weighed 120 pounds. Seven years into the job, I suddenly gained over 70 pounds due to increased stress and anxiety. I went all the way up to 194. At only 5'2, that's a lot. I know what all my coworkers are thinking. "How did she get so fat and how on earth could she let herself go like that?" It's embarrassing and I get so MAD at myself for allowing myself to gain all this weight.

    So far, on my new low calorie, high lean protein diet, I have lost 9 pounds in 3 and a half weeks. That's a little encouraging, but I still have a long way to go. Meanwhile, I feel hurt that my weight is being made fun of. Even my grandmother can't stop talking about how much weight I've gained. I know she does it, because she has done it to my other family members who have gained weight, including my daughter, in the past. I feel so overwhelmed with all the weight I have to lose. And embarrassed as well. Can anybody else relate?
     
  2. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    Maybe they're small-minded people who make themselves feel better by pointing out another's shortcomings, because they have such low self-esteem about their own shortcomings. Maybe they're "below the line" people, you know, those who never have a nice thought to say, how sad for them. People who are above the line, don't do that, don't care, and accept others because they accept themselves. Stay away from the below the line types, always negative.....

    Rise above it CB, ignore her, it will drive her crazy. In fact, smile at her with what I call the "you're so pretty" fake smile. Let it roll off your back, I always say what others think of me is none of my business.
     
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  3. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Well, I'm 5'4" and hovering close to 280. I know I'm overweight, and while I don't particularly enjoy being heavy, I'm doing what I can do at this moment in time. I take care with my appearance, hair and makeup done, clothes that fit appropriately (not tight and not baggy), and I make sure I feel comfortable with what I have on. I'm a substitute teacher, so my work wardrobe consists of denim (capris or jeans) and T-shirts (short or 3/4 sleeves), depending on the weather.

    One of my friends' mom's used to say, "If you can't hide it, paint it red," and I've totally embraced that logic. I can't hide my weight. I dress for me, not for my hubby, my daughter, or anyone else. I understand the overwhelming feeling, but you didn't gain it overnight, and you won't lose it overnight, either. One step at a time.

    This is not to say your feelings of embarrassment aren't valid, just try not to let your feelings consume you. Easier said than done, I know.
     
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  4. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    How awful. Your post makes me so sad.

    You can lose weight. It's not important.

    You are unlikely to change a cold heart, like the people at your job.

    I'm so sorry. How petty.
     
  5. Tanya M

    Tanya M Living with an attitude of gratitude Staff Member

    CB, I'm so sorry you had to deal with that.

    Only very insecure person with lack of moral values would make fun of someone.

    I do not care what someone looks like or how much they weigh, I am more concerned what their heart looks like and how they treat people. I have never met you in real life but I can tell you are a compassionate person who cares and feels deeply.
    Don't waste your precious energy on these shallow minded people. If anything, feel sorry for them.

    ((HUGS)) to you sweet lady!
     
  6. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm sorry CB, some folks can be so cruel.

    It helps me to do my level best not to take stuff like that personally (although I do understand how hard it is NOT to) and to recall that when someone points a finger at you, 4 fingers are pointing back at them......when women are cruel in that way, to me it represents their insecurity, their own dismal self image......so hurting your feelings makes them feel better about themselves. Crummy I know, but remember Middle School? The height of girl cruelty to other girls......some small minded people don't grow beyond that stage.

    Do your best to let it go. As the saying goes, "What they think of you is none of your business." Hold your head up high and rejoice in the loss of 9 pounds (which incidentally is GREAT).

    Focus on how much weight you've lost, celebrate that. Sending you big hugs......
     
  7. mof

    mof Momdidntsignupforthis

    Though your weight might bother you, and maybe them..it's not who you are!

    Our appearance is just that, We can look great and be so very broken inside. Rise above these smallminded petty people. Please remember, YOU ARE ENOUGH, I believe your spiritual...he made you in his image.

    On a hee, hee note...I have son who prefers girls with curves..he says I like girls who can enjoy a meal!
     
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  8. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    Congrats on the weight loss! That is great.

    I plan to start a diet in January. I see my weight slowly creeping up every year. Things are tight etc.

    It's more important what is inside than on the outside but it's also important to take care of yourself and be healthy!