I have three beautiful children, ages 9, 7 and 5. My 7 year old son has some major behavioral issues. I am absolutely certain that he has ODD but I am very confused by what else is going on with him. We have been having issues with him since he was about 2 years old and have had him evaluated by more professionals then you care to count. We have heard everything from bipolar to high functioning autism and the list goes on. We have had blood test, allergy test, eeg, etc. They were all normal.
Through the years, certain behaviors have come and gone. The one thing that has remained constant has been his inability to interact in an appropriate manner around other people. He cannot control his temper. His feelings are very easily hurt and when his feelings get hurt he will lash out. He has broken a neighbors window because he was angry at her son. We have had the police called to our house by another neighbor because he was throwing things over our fence at the neighbor. One neighbor came by our house to tell us that our son had cursed at him. Another neighbor came to our door to tell us that he placed bricks on their car because they told him not to throw sticks in their yard. I know this sounds like we just let him run wild around the neighborhood but we don't, we have too much to loose. He will just walk out the door if we are cleaning, etc. We constantly have to go looking for him when he goes outside.
He has also had extreme difficulties at school. He was expelled from first grade in April due to his behavior. If the teachers' ever make him angry he will call them bad names in the class or write a bad name on a note and have another child take it to the teacher. The funny thing is that even when he is sent to the principal, he never tries to deny that he misbehaved. It is like he wants people to know that he is getting them back. We have tried every form of discipline and nothing works. He just will not conform to the rules of society. If you try to talk with him about his behavior he will either get very frustrated or act silly by licking his foot or doing something else very odd like chewing on his shirt and he acts like he cannot understand what you are saying. But he can.
He also seems to try to offend people for some reason. He does strange things around other children and seems to find enjoyment if they respond in a negative manner. He is always being called weird by other children and I know this has to hurt his feelings but he continues to do it. He wants to have friends but he just can't seem to keep them because he always ends up offending people.
A very major issue in my home is that he absolutely and completely despises his 5 year old sister. Every single day he hits her about a hundred times. His reasons are that she was looking at him funny or she sneezed loudly and it bothered him, etc. This absolutely infuriates me because it is like she cannot even live a peaceful life because he is constantly trying to hurt her. He has received spankings for this and I have talked with him
until I am blue in the face and he just wants to make her life miserable. He also likes to aggrevate his other sister and his father and myself. His 9 year old sister is always asking to go to her grandmother's house because he drives her crazy. We have holes in our walls and nothing in my house is of any value because he breaks things all the time.
We are not perfect parents by any means but we do our best. We are not drug users or abusive or absent parents, etc. I sometimes feel like we have to defend ourselves because we have had people say things like "Where did he hear that kind of language" or we get disapproving looks from people, etc. because of our son's behavior. The one thing that is different between my husband and myself is that he is very strict on my son and does not let him get away with anything. I like to try to pick my battles because they are so frequent with my son.
My son can be a very loving child. He loves to snuggle and can seem very well behaved when he is one on one with adults. It is adding other people to the mix that seems to put him into a tailspin.
We are at a point here where I have run out of solutions and I feel like time is slipping away to try to help him with his behavior. I honestly do not know what to do anymore. I am desperately asking for any recommendations or thoughts on what could possibly help my son.
Through the years, certain behaviors have come and gone. The one thing that has remained constant has been his inability to interact in an appropriate manner around other people. He cannot control his temper. His feelings are very easily hurt and when his feelings get hurt he will lash out. He has broken a neighbors window because he was angry at her son. We have had the police called to our house by another neighbor because he was throwing things over our fence at the neighbor. One neighbor came by our house to tell us that our son had cursed at him. Another neighbor came to our door to tell us that he placed bricks on their car because they told him not to throw sticks in their yard. I know this sounds like we just let him run wild around the neighborhood but we don't, we have too much to loose. He will just walk out the door if we are cleaning, etc. We constantly have to go looking for him when he goes outside.
He has also had extreme difficulties at school. He was expelled from first grade in April due to his behavior. If the teachers' ever make him angry he will call them bad names in the class or write a bad name on a note and have another child take it to the teacher. The funny thing is that even when he is sent to the principal, he never tries to deny that he misbehaved. It is like he wants people to know that he is getting them back. We have tried every form of discipline and nothing works. He just will not conform to the rules of society. If you try to talk with him about his behavior he will either get very frustrated or act silly by licking his foot or doing something else very odd like chewing on his shirt and he acts like he cannot understand what you are saying. But he can.
He also seems to try to offend people for some reason. He does strange things around other children and seems to find enjoyment if they respond in a negative manner. He is always being called weird by other children and I know this has to hurt his feelings but he continues to do it. He wants to have friends but he just can't seem to keep them because he always ends up offending people.
A very major issue in my home is that he absolutely and completely despises his 5 year old sister. Every single day he hits her about a hundred times. His reasons are that she was looking at him funny or she sneezed loudly and it bothered him, etc. This absolutely infuriates me because it is like she cannot even live a peaceful life because he is constantly trying to hurt her. He has received spankings for this and I have talked with him
until I am blue in the face and he just wants to make her life miserable. He also likes to aggrevate his other sister and his father and myself. His 9 year old sister is always asking to go to her grandmother's house because he drives her crazy. We have holes in our walls and nothing in my house is of any value because he breaks things all the time.
We are not perfect parents by any means but we do our best. We are not drug users or abusive or absent parents, etc. I sometimes feel like we have to defend ourselves because we have had people say things like "Where did he hear that kind of language" or we get disapproving looks from people, etc. because of our son's behavior. The one thing that is different between my husband and myself is that he is very strict on my son and does not let him get away with anything. I like to try to pick my battles because they are so frequent with my son.
My son can be a very loving child. He loves to snuggle and can seem very well behaved when he is one on one with adults. It is adding other people to the mix that seems to put him into a tailspin.
We are at a point here where I have run out of solutions and I feel like time is slipping away to try to help him with his behavior. I honestly do not know what to do anymore. I am desperately asking for any recommendations or thoughts on what could possibly help my son.