It comes in threes...........

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Hound dog, Jan 30, 2013.

  1. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    I know I posted about Betsy's aggression a while back. Nichole had made the appointment with our vet to have her put to sleep after searching high and low for a rescue or shelter or anyone willing to cope with a dog with aggression issues.

    I'm going to start off by saying that this is extremely difficult for me tonight. I helped bring Betsy into this world. In the morning I will be helping her leave it.

    Yet for some reason it makes me feel selfish to say that tonight I feel shredded inside........ Or maybe emotionally beat up would be better. I dunno.

    Originally I believed Betsy's aggressive outbursts were either vying for dominance with Molly or jealousy over me (as it tended to happen most often if I was nearby). I kept them separated for 2 yrs using baby gates. Or I did my best to do so. The only place they could be together was in the yard. Why that was so I have no clue. But there were those times when Fred or Travis would forget to shut a baby gate.......or a visitor would forget........and it was just a royal PITA to have to do that. Not to mention that it was just not fair to Betsy especially after Fred passed for her to get the attention she should have. (she was Fred's buddy dog, he hung out with her more in the livingroom) I had no 2nd thoughts about sending her to Nichole's because she was originally to go with Nichole when she moved out on her own anyway. She was close to both Nichole and Aubrey and she grew up around Nichole's husband from him always being here. I figured she'd get plenty of attention ect and no longer have to be gated.

    Evidently Betsy's aggression really doesn't have it's basis in either dominance or jealousy. Whatever is causing is getting progressively worse. Which is why Nichole had set the date to have her put down. Her husband had talked her out of it and had convinced Nichole she was overreacting. There have been many more incidences since.....each worse than the last. Nichole contacted me yesterday and sent me photos of Baily her beagle pup asking if I thought she needed stitches. I don't think the wounds were deep enough but I could see that Betsy bit her no nonsense right in the face. It's the 3rd time she's drawn blood.

    Unfortunately it's not just the pup, it's the cats.......she's done it with Oliver once.

    I have a hard time with this because this is not Betsy's "normal" personality. I believe it, as I've seen it. It's just so random most of the time it just doesn't make sense, nor is it predictable. Which is why I always kept her gated. It can take just someone walking near her to set her off. Otherwise she is the sweetest dog you could ever meet. It's like she has split personalities.

    I talked with Nichole a long time over this. I know it's not an easy decision to make. I even had her call the vet that has cared for Betsy since she was born and talk it over with her. Vet said the same thing. It's too dangerous to let it continue.

    Nichole is already having a hard time dealing with this. It's not just I who have lost 2 beloved pets already, but she has too. I'm going to be worried about her drive down here due to her state of mind. I wish that I could just tell her to bring Betsy home, but that isn't the answer either. Not just because of Maggie but because there are grandchildren that come and go here all the time. I can trust me never to forget to shut a baby's everyone else who forgets. All it takes is one time forgetting. But I really deep in my soul wish that I could do that instead.
  2. Calamity Jane

    Calamity Jane Well-Known Member

    Oh, Hound, that is so sad, but Nichole did the right thing by being honest with the vet/shelters about Betsy's aggression. I think many people never say anything, and then bad things happen when unsuspecting folks adopt the agressive dog.

    This has to be so dreadful for you, and I'm sorry. May Betsy rest in peace.
  3. HaoZi

    HaoZi CD Hall of Fame

    Oh dear. *HUGS* I wish I had answers. Sometimes ear infections (deep inner ear infections) can do this.
  4. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    Oh, so sad. I'm sorry you had to say goodbye to third four-legged friend in so short time.

    Betsy's aggression does sound typical for pain induced aggression. Ear infection could cause that but some dogs I have heard of who had that type of aggression were in fact having spondylosis. It's in fact quite common, there are breeds in which more than half of the dogs develop it (boxer being worst I think.) For some it isn't causing so much pain, for some it does. For many it causes pain only now and then. Dog with it doesn't really limp or show other obvious signs of discomfort and because it can cause high, sudden pain, it may more easier to cause aggressive behaviour because dog doesn't really know what causes the pain and may think it is the thing closest to it and attack.
  5. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip


    Lisa, having met Betsy... I saw her sweet side. I'm not a dog person, as you know... But I also trust Nichole's judgment, and, well, Baily and the cats aside... Aggression toward a human - any human, baby or not - is just not something you can "deal" with.

    Besides, I have to say this... Think of how she will be able to play with Molly and Rowdy now - no aggression just play.
  6. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm so sorry Lisa, you've had too much loss lately. (((HUGS))))
  7. the Sassy one

    the Sassy one New Member

    Hound Dog, thank you for your reply to my post, and I edited my post corrected misselled etc.

    Know I well keeping you in my thoughs and prayers and sending {{HUGS}} from OK.

    I HOPE things turn around for you soon. Sassy
  8. buddy

    buddy New Member

    {{{{{Hound }}}}}
    What a rough patch you're having. I bet there is something underneath it all that probably is not to be found or helped on earth. Fred will watch her till you all meet again. Sending you love and comforting thoughts as you go through this journey.
  9. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Sending prayers for a peaceful journey and hugs to your hurting hearts. This is just too much. I'm so very sorry!
  10. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry, Lisa. Hugs for you and Nichole.
  11. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry, Lisa. Aggression was the main reason I had to put my babies in a sanctuary. Two were aggressive to other animals and one to other animals and anyone who came into our house that wasn't in the pack. So nobody ever came over. There is something called "rage syndrome" that can happen with cocker spaniels. I do not know if it can happen with other breeds, but normally sweet dogs suddenly get fits of craziness and rage and nobody knows why.

    Luckily, we have that sanctuary and they would take our dogs. I wish you had one there. Hugs to you and Nichole.
  12. Signorina

    Signorina Guest

    Thinking of you and Nichole XO
  13. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    Oh Lisa - I'm so sorry....
  14. Hopeless

    Hopeless ....Hopeful Now

    Lisa so sorry. Hugs to you and Nichole
  15. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Oh, no.
    I'm sorry.
    I'm sending hugs and understanding and strength to you and Nichole, and hugs to Betsy.
  16. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    This is going to sound strange...........

    But the Betsy that I saw today was not the Betsy I know. Now she was sweet and loving, don't get me wrong. But there was something "off" and I noticed it immediately.

    Nichole brought her here first. Maggie was gated into the kitchen and Betsy into the livingroom (across the entire house from each other) because traffic made it so Nichole arrived early. Nichole dropped Betsy off and went to take Oliver to easy child's house so we wouldn't have to take him along with us.

    This was my lovey time with her........well, mine and Travis. Except for the past year, this was Betsy's only home. Yet her reaction to being home seemed "off" too. She was happy to see both of us, but not her usual self at all, not even close. She was walking oddly......not awful but there was a wrongness with her gait. The way she looked at us was odd.

    Then I noticed something really strange. Might or might not mean a darn thing, I dunno. Betsy is Rowdy's daughter and although she was pure Black she got his coat.......that super thick dense fur with the undercoat so thick you can't find the skin beneath. I was petting her when it suddenly hit me something was wrong with her fur. It looked as if she'd been shaved. So I inspected it more closely......the only thing there was her undercoat, the outer coat seemed not to be present at all. (the outer coat is much longer than the undercoat, I normally can literally bury my hands in it) I wondered if she'd dropped her coat recently.....but no, I've dealt with too many years of Betsy's shedding to know for certain that even dropping coat her fur is densely thick and long. Today it was very short. So I asked Nichole when she returned from easy child's house if she'd shaved her for some reason?? Nope. She told me it had been that way for as long as she could recall. I corrected her because I just saw Betsy not that long ago and literally buried my hands in her fur. (right before xmas)

    After dealing with Molly and Rowdy I got the deep gut feeling Betsy was not well. I think I would've gotten that feeling regardless of my experience with the other two because was just so in your face. Nothing obvious except the gait (which could be just old age) and the fur. Just so NOT the dog I played with snuggled at Thanksgiving or right before xmas either.

    It took about 5 minutes of assessing her before I felt the "rightness" of putting her down beyond the aggression. Maybe without the aggression she could've been allowed to go in her own time, but I think her days were numbered regardless. Nichole said she'd been "off" like that for a while......and I do remember her telling me that from time to time, I just didn't realize this is what she meant. Like she recognized Travis and I but didn't seem to recognize the house....which doesn't make much sense as it looks exactly like it did when she lived here.

    Vet was very kind. Betsy went very peacefully the same as Molly with both Nichole and I right there with her until the very end. They will be buried together in a special spot in the back yard. Aubrey has asked to be part of that, not surprising when she grew up with all three of them.

    My heart is extremely heavy today. It has been one hellova week and a half. :(
  17. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    I had to put my beloved German Shepherd down due to random human aggression. Unfortunately, I waited too long and he bit a neighbor quite badly. He was found on necropsy to have a brain tumor in the amygdala; the part of the brain that controls aggressive behavior. This might be what is going on with Betsy.

    My heart goes out to you. It is a very hard thing to lose any furkid. To have to euthanize one that appears to be healthy is especially heartbreaking.
  18. cubsgirl

    cubsgirl Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry to hear this. ((hugs))
  19. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am so very sorry. There is a type of epilepsy in some dogs that isn't really treatable with medications and it causes the sudden aggression and attacks and when the seizure is over, the dog doesn't seem to even know that it was aggressive. I have wondered about this from past posts about Betsy.

    Once aggression to humans is not due to a 'bad human behavior' cause, there isn't much that can be done other than the choice you are making. They just are not safe. I am so sorry. To keep her alive now would mean that she had to be so closely guarded and segregated that she wouldn't really have any quality of life. That does not make it easier though. (((((hugs)))))
  20. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm sorry Lisa, I think everyone here is sending you lots of love and tenderness............we can't stop the losses, but we can stand with you in your grief and comfort you with our care............gentle hugs...........