For some reason, it isn't that easy to find a doctor that treats Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) right either. You have to look for one that does CBT/ERP (Exposure Response Therapy). When you are calling, ask about ERP for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). If they don't know what that is, they are not the right one. I also think it is important to have a therapist that will set up the exposures and do them during the appointment and not just give homework.
There is a Yahoo group for parents of kids with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) that is very helpful. It is a lot like this board, but only about Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). Some of those kids have BiPolar (BP) and other disorders, too, so there are parents there that can share their experience with that.
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is mind boggling. It looks like they should just get past it and do whatever it is they are afraid of. It looks so simple, but it isn't.
My daughter's issue that led us to intensive ERP treatment was that she had recurring thoughts of zombies. She knew there weren't any, but she thought about them following her up the stairs or coming in the room if she was there by herself. She could not get those thoughts out of her head and she was scared, even though, logically, she knew that wasn't going to happen.
She would not stay by herself in a room. If I went to another part of the house, she followed me, in a panic. One of us had to lay down with her while she went to sleep. Eventually, I had to sleep with her. She probably would have acted like your daughter at night if I hadn't. (I am not saying that you should start sleeping with your daughter, only showing how extreme it was for us.) She was 11 when this was going on.
Her ERP therapist came to our house 2 or 3 times a week for 3 hours at a time. He had her go into a room by herself for a few seconds at first, then she worked up to more. He had a zombie doll that she had to take with her when she worked up to that and she was supposed to think about the doll coming to life. She was supposed to feel the anxiety and see that she could cope and that the anxiety would go down, even if she stayed in the room by herself. She started with small exposures that would make her anxious and worked up to bigger ones.
Some people do need medications to be able to do these exercises. At the time, we thought she could not tolerate the SSRI's, so she was doing it without. Eventually, we added a very low dose of Lexapro and something to help her sleep, so this probably contributed to her progress.
Today, she still takes Lexapro and another a/d for sleep but has absolutely no problems staying by herself. She still has other Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) issues, but nothing as extreme as that problem was.
A different therapist could have said she was needy and demanding of my attention. I had to come up with the Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) idea myself and look for a doctor who would treat it that way. After treating it as an Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) thing and not as a need for attention, she doesn't look needy or attention-seeking. To me, that opinion from doctors isn't very helpful. I think the neediness is a symptom and not a cause by itself.
I really think this kind of treatment could help your daughter.