At FA on Wednesday, we discussed if going places (like out to lunch, golfing, to the zoo etc.) with our actively addicted difficult children was enabling. My husband and I always wonder about that. Should we reward difficult child by having her go along on family outings etc. The group felt like we (the group) should spend time with our difficult children when they are willing and have good family interactions and include them when possible. Several older people mentioned they would give anything if their addicts even wanted to spend a moment with them. One cute granny mentioned that she would do anything to keep her family close and she felt like those family outings were important, she longed for her daughter to want to come. I have been doing my best to have my family together for a few meals a week (hard with our schedules). I want to take difficult child with me when I have to run errands-it was a tradition for years and she was a help-I miss it and she said she did to. We always stopped to get a treat as part of the deal. I stopped because we had decided not to spend any money on her-it seems ridiculous now. What about you guys??