Males have more problems as adults or do we hide the females?

[AppleCori]

I do believe that boys struggle more than girls. Having worked in special education many years, boys always outnumbered girls. I also believe schools are set up to teach to girls' temperaments. Plus the teachers are predominantly women with a woman's temperament.

Totally agree!

I think our public schools are doing a disservice to our boys, especially in the early elementary years.

Many boys under age 10 are not able to sit quietly for long periods of time in a classroom filled with 20+ other kids. Distractions, noise, boredom, and the physical act of writing is often too much for many boys (and some girls).

And what do we do about this?

We drug them, punish them, withhold recess, separate them from their peers, label them, and (in some cases) this sets them up to hate school for the rest of their lives.

This artificial environment we have set up for them, in fairly recent modern history, is not working for many of our boys.

 

[BusynMember]

Expectations for boys in society is evening out but it is still harder for boys to live at home with parents in 20s than girls. Girls usually mature earlier, except borderline girls, and gain more from a hand up.

I know boy brains mature later, but some of our men are still children at 30. That has nothing to do with brain growth. Most men are fully launched by then.

 

[Maisy]

Apple cori what you said is exactly what happened to my son. School was an awful experience for him and for me in trying to get him through.

 

[Albatross]

As far as difficulty parenting, my daughter was far more challenging until she reached age 15 or so, then became a real joy to be around other than some "normal" teenage mood swings. My son was an absolute joy to have around until age 13 or so, then went off the rails completely.

Both of my children attended a private school through junior high. One year the principal of the school, feeling that the public education system was very "male-centric," took steps she felt would make school more meaningful to girls. I remember one requirement, which I thought was very silly and sexist, was that all projects in all classes had to be decorated with borders and stickers. Also, all projects had to be done "collaboratively" and the kids were graded as a group, because she felt girls are natural team builders and that wasn't being fostered in the public schools. The supplies list each year included things like stickers, scrapbooking materials, etc. and ran about $300 each. It was pretty crazy.

 

[BusynMember]

My oldest son was challenging from toddlerhood even though school was easy for him.

I feel schools are geared for average kids who have an easy time learning and following rules. There are more boys who have trouble in these than girls. Even male teachers that my kids had seemed to favor females.

 

[toughlovin]

We watched a very interesting documentary today that talks about this issue. It's called The Mask You Live In and you can get it on Netflix. I highly recommend it

 

[Maisy]

Absolutely schools are geared towards the average, compliant child. The upper levels and lower levels are a mixed bag of services, and very lacking in the public schools except for the kids with extreme difficulties. Then schools become a babysitting service. If you want better education experiences for your troubled or gifted (often one and the same) child then you have to pay a lot of money to a private school and even those do not want any child who is too different or difficult. I dealt with this with my highly intelligent, difficult child as well as being a teacher in special education in the public schools. Another problem is in urban areas, schools have just gotten too big, especially high schools.

 

[A dad]

I agree the school is geared towards the average compliant child even in my country but to its credit they are trying to change it fit all. For the last 20 years there where all kinds of changes to the school system you know to make a all size fits all kind of school. Unfortunate it was a miss after a miss and it hurt the school system badly I am starting to think that there is no way to have a school for all kinds of children its either one or the other there is no on size fits all.
Because of this more and more children are abandoning school each year which is not good. Its sad actually because this happened because it was done with good intentions and it had a bad effect I can not even be mad on the people who tried to change the system I am mad that the world is so unfair.

 

[Maisy]

I agree that some changes have been made but a good deal of positive educational programs have been scrapped due to so much emphasis on college bound expectations. Such as shop, home Easy Child, allowing students to be involved in many different activities that are not necessarily tied to academics. Easing children into academics instead of all this pressure especially in elementary. My son had to write in a journal in kindergarten. Was red flagged because he did not want to. He grew to hate writing. I could go on and on....

 

[Maisy]

Home Easy Child, not home easy child. Hate spell check.

 

[Lil]

Home Easy Child, not home easy child. Hate spell check.

Not spell check...it's the editor on this site that translates certain abbreviations to words. If I talk about my blood pressure medications, I have to type it out because B_P (without the dash) comes out as BiPolar (BP).

I see you meant Home economics.

I agree with you. What was wrong with shop class and auto mechanics and home economics? What is wrong with teaching a skill? Our local high school does have a tech school "attached" and you can take certain classes in there now...but not the basics like when I was a kid.