shawnb
New Member
Our 13 year old son Michael has always been - quirky. I have no problem with quirky, as he has also been exceptionally bright. Positive. Generous - he loves to help out.
But he's always had a narrow obsession with one thing or another. It changes over time. A few years ago, it was video games. More recently, paintball gear. Currently it's the rock band Green Day. He goes to a catholic school, & his classmates are excellent. They've always been pretty tolerant of his eccentricities. But as they head into teen-hood, Michael's teachers relate that his behavior is pushing him further & further from the rest of the class. EVERY project, assignment, every schoolyard discussion, whatever, he turns to Green Day... The class groans & rolls their eyes collectively... And they tell me so...
All his life he's shown a number of other symptoms. Professorial speech, socially clueless, physically clumsy (though his class is so small, they need all boys playing sports, and he does play).
The social queue issues are not extreme at all. He can make eye contact. He talks normally, no monotone. He can understand others' frustrations & needs. Just not when it relates to him.
His teachers tell me he plays with his hands all day at school, with a pen & a compass. They just leave him be & figure it helps him concentrate.
So far, so good, nothing too far out of the ordinary.
However, lately he's been trending in the WRONG direction... Fighting with his mom over homework, but not in a normal teen way, in a quite vicious way. Two classmates who saw this tried to tell him not to be so uncool to his mom. His response: "It's OK. I'm winning. I got her to cry last night."
I want to shave his head & look for 666s.
Many other symptoms - lots of tantrums showing up lately, when we discipline him for bad behavior, when we take away the computer, when we try to force certain actions on him. E.g., for years he's been an altar boy. Actually, he loves (loved...) helping out. This last weekend, he didn't want to go. We didn't want the church to be left without a helper, so we tried to get him to do at least a couple more weeks. He threw a tantrum that would shame a 3 year old when we told him he couldn't use his iPod unless he served at church.
We're having lots of factual disconnects, e.g., were assignments turned in? Did we agree to take him to the store? He calls us liars, when we know exactly what happened. I can't tell if he knows he's lieing to us, or if he's just hoping nobody else notices? The behavior has turned devious at times.
We had an eye-opening conference with his teachers on Friday with Michael present. It was very difficult, but they caught him in another few layers of lies. They did agree that his grades were shot, but that's not the important thing. We started the meeting off thinking we might kickstart his efforts back at school. We ended up agreeing we may need a doctor's help. I call his pediatrician tomorrow.
My suspicion - yet to be confirmed - is mild Asperger's. Possibly with a touch of ODD.
Any input would be appreciated.
But he's always had a narrow obsession with one thing or another. It changes over time. A few years ago, it was video games. More recently, paintball gear. Currently it's the rock band Green Day. He goes to a catholic school, & his classmates are excellent. They've always been pretty tolerant of his eccentricities. But as they head into teen-hood, Michael's teachers relate that his behavior is pushing him further & further from the rest of the class. EVERY project, assignment, every schoolyard discussion, whatever, he turns to Green Day... The class groans & rolls their eyes collectively... And they tell me so...
All his life he's shown a number of other symptoms. Professorial speech, socially clueless, physically clumsy (though his class is so small, they need all boys playing sports, and he does play).
The social queue issues are not extreme at all. He can make eye contact. He talks normally, no monotone. He can understand others' frustrations & needs. Just not when it relates to him.
His teachers tell me he plays with his hands all day at school, with a pen & a compass. They just leave him be & figure it helps him concentrate.
So far, so good, nothing too far out of the ordinary.
However, lately he's been trending in the WRONG direction... Fighting with his mom over homework, but not in a normal teen way, in a quite vicious way. Two classmates who saw this tried to tell him not to be so uncool to his mom. His response: "It's OK. I'm winning. I got her to cry last night."
I want to shave his head & look for 666s.
Many other symptoms - lots of tantrums showing up lately, when we discipline him for bad behavior, when we take away the computer, when we try to force certain actions on him. E.g., for years he's been an altar boy. Actually, he loves (loved...) helping out. This last weekend, he didn't want to go. We didn't want the church to be left without a helper, so we tried to get him to do at least a couple more weeks. He threw a tantrum that would shame a 3 year old when we told him he couldn't use his iPod unless he served at church.
We're having lots of factual disconnects, e.g., were assignments turned in? Did we agree to take him to the store? He calls us liars, when we know exactly what happened. I can't tell if he knows he's lieing to us, or if he's just hoping nobody else notices? The behavior has turned devious at times.
We had an eye-opening conference with his teachers on Friday with Michael present. It was very difficult, but they caught him in another few layers of lies. They did agree that his grades were shot, but that's not the important thing. We started the meeting off thinking we might kickstart his efforts back at school. We ended up agreeing we may need a doctor's help. I call his pediatrician tomorrow.
My suspicion - yet to be confirmed - is mild Asperger's. Possibly with a touch of ODD.
Any input would be appreciated.