I need some feedback on this. My son has used me as his sounding board about this terrible marriage in which I believe his wife is going overboard trying to make my son feel like dirt. She is also refusing to get help for my grandson who was assessed and is delayed. And she is certainly not nice to me. She has called me up and yelled at me once and I put up with it for my son's sake. Question: How far do we go to put up with nasty in-laws? I know I have to see her for short intervals during the holidays. She will hang onto grandson and won't let me interact with him. I can deal with that. If she is rude, should I just take it? I was always nice to my mother-in-law, even when I couldn't stand her son. She was older than me and she'd always been nice to me. I have bent over backward to be a good mother-in-law to M. She doesn't like me anyway and I feel too tired from a lifetime of abuse to put up with more. But I can. How would you react to a twenty-eight year old daughter-in-law who you know has said that she "hates" you (although you really didn't do anything bad to her) and who has called you up to yell at you and who mistreats your own child? It sure makes me feel like taking the two kids who still live with me and go elsewhere for the holidays . But I do want to see my son and grandson and, more importantly, my daughter who lives in Illinois and has nothing to do with this mess. I can have a short fuse and get stressed out easily, but I have also learned how to bite my tongue even when the fuse has exploded. Thoughts from the Wise Ones? Also, last night I told my son I can't be his sounding board about his bad marriage anymore. It's stressing me out and giving me sleepless nights. And no matter how bad it gets, he isn't going to leave her and she isn't going to leave him either, although I'm not sure why (suspect she is afraid to leave due to money, not because she loves son). Was that wrong? He's a very shy young man. I suspect possible Aspergers, but he has a social phobia at the least. But, truly, it is making me a nervous wreck to listen. What do you think about my being his sounding board? He's no kid. He's 31.