One of my worst nightmares


Well-Known Member
Last night my son's incision started bleeding so I took him to the ER. We were there till 1:30 a.m. They said a little bleeding was normal, and showed me how to change his bandages (the hospital never showed me.) Anyway, I only got an hour of sleep. Whenever I don't sleep, my anxiety is absolutely horrendous. Right now I'm sitting at my desk and my heart is racing, I have a bad headache, I feel a huge adrenaline rush, and I am getting chest pains. I still have another 2 and a half hours before I can leave, and then I need to stop by the pharmacy to pick up some antibiotic ointment. I need to make it through this day in one piece. That's all I ask!


Crazy Cat Lady
Number one. Stay away from coffee and caffeinated beverages, even if you are (with good reason) tired. You've got to try redirecting the anxiety.

Nope. Don't want to think about that. I'll think about THIS instead. It takes some doing and a lot of repetition, but it does help. Also, try deep calming breaths. Inhale through through your nose, using your belly muscles so that your tummy expands as you inhale. Exhale sloooowly through your mouth.

Visualize calmness and peace coming in as you breathe, and anxiety and stress leaving as you exhale. Repeat several times.

These are some tricks I use when I'm not in a situation where I want to take a trank. It does help.


Well-Known Member
I have had several therapists try and teach me those deep breathing techniques but they never work on me. I took an aspirin and I am now sipping on some chamomile tea. I hope it helps. I still have almost two hours to go.


Roll With It
Get yourself a box of Tension Tamer tea. It is by Celestial Seasonings and tastes a TON better than chamomile and it is more relaxing than straight chamomile. If chamomile helps, typical teen will likely help more. I swear by it. It is at most grocery stores and Walmarts.

I am SO SORRY that your son is going through this. I think it is criminal that they have not given him pain medications. I would have a FIT if they did that to my kid. I think that is sheer cruelty to make someone recover from major surgery with-o pain medications. I sure would not be eating if I didn't have pain medications after surgery. Even the thought would be scary.

I would suggest beef or chicken broth for him. It can help settle his stomach. I know my mom would suggest baby beef or chicken as they are easy to swallow and have protein and are not sweet. Personally they make me sick, but it is a texture thing as that is my major sensitivity. It might be something he could choke down to get some nutrition.

I hope and pray this isn't cancer. That would be my biggest fear also. Please contact his doctor and let them know he is in a HUGE amount of pain and is not able to handle school yet, esp without pain medications. Tell them flat out that tylenol and ibuprofen are not cutting it and that he NEEDS appropriate pain management. I think it is sadistic to make him go through major surgery liek this with-o pain medication. I think you should have an absolute mother lion eating the idiots moment as you chew them out and ask if they wnat you to perform surgery on them with-o anesthetic and with-o pain medications after = if not then they NEED to manage your son's pain appropriately. You also need to coach him to tell the doctor how it hurts terribly and to show the pain and not hide it. They will try to brush you off but as his mom you need to advocate for him. As a patient he has the absolute RIGHT to appropriate pain management!!!

This tool helps rate how much pain you have with different tasks. It may help you explain to the doctor how much pain your son is in.

I would look at various drinks to get him to drink liquids rather than pushing food right now. Chances are that food may hurt as it moves through his system. Pain can make you very nauseous and it may be a problem with keeping food down. I have that as a major issue and sometimes food can even trigger the nausea once it is in my stomach, esp if I am in a lot of pain. Water often upsets my stomach, esp tap water. I hope that you find something that he can eat soon, and drink.

(((((hugs))))) I am so sorry that your son is going through this, and that you are having to deal with the increased anxiety on top of your regular anxiety issues. You are all in my prayers.


Well-Known Member
She told me she was having such bad anxiety about it that she could barely focus on work.
CB. Are you beginning to believe me that the rest of us deal with some variant of the same thing you do?

I ended up quitting my stupid job. M had to drive me back and forth. Because I am afraid to drive outside of town (freeways, big trucks and tailgaters scare me). I bet you can drive!


Well-Known Member
Well guess what? Our follow up appointment with the surgeon is on Thursday. I will get the news then if it is cancerous or not. Thursday is my birthday. This year my birthday is going to go really really good, or really really bad. I hope and pray I get the best gift ever in finding out my son does not have cancer. In the mean time, I am here at work on the first day of school and going crazy. All those phone calls I have to make to track down missing students, and on top of it all my supervisor snapped at me earlier when I asked her to help translate for me on a Spanish call. She told me she was busy and not to ask her again. The other two Spanish speaking ladies in the office did not pick up their phone when I attempted to call and ask for their help. I just want this to be over. I want everything to go back to normal, dammit.


Well-Known Member
I meant do you have a support system when times are rough..
I do have my mom and my online boyfriend, who lives in Nebraska. I still feel like everybody is sort of blowing me off, wondering why on earth I'm so scared. Even the surgeon asked me why I was so concerned when we were in the hospital. This is my baby boy we are talking about. Of course I'm scared. I feel like nobody else really gets it. I do appreciate all of you here who have helped with your kind words, prayers, and support.


Well-Known Member
We know why you're so scared, honey. I wish I could be there to share coffee and talk and be there for you...and not have you go alone. im so sorry and by what the surgeon said to you the odds are in your son's favor. I will pray. and I will think of you.

Think of all of us holding your hand. We care about you and your children.


Well-Known Member
Thinking of you today and hoping for the best outcome possible. Praying for a spirit of peace and calmness to surround you.