Hi there all, I am new here, and have been reading some posts and felt I just had to try to get some help and advice on my situation before i reach the end of my tether.
I seriously believe my 7 year old daughter had ODD. I wouldnt class her as hyperactive and have therefore been looking for conditions similar to ADHD and ADD but when I come across ODD, I could tick every single box in the diagnosis section with ease. Some questions were saying if the child had shown signs of a particular item within the last 3 months, but my daughter is daily and it's getting worse.
Her behaviour has been somewhat "testing" since about 2-3 years old but I had put it down to her age. Then when she was 4-5 I put it down to her needing to start school, she was ready for it. But it has got worse. Much worse. Especially in the last 6 months or so.
Typical morning for us:
She gets up after a good sleep (which is one good thing I suppose, and I can't put her behaviour down to being tired). then we have to get ready for school. so we always have breakfast first. I allow her to pick her breakfast and then I get it ready for her. She will take on average about 25 mins to half hour to eat a bowl or cereal, this is normal for her and her pace. Can sometimes take her about an hour to eat her dinner! Then its time to have a wash, which she will point blank refuse to do. I have even just got her babywipes to make it much easier but even that is a hassle.
Then its teeth brushing. my goodness what a battle that is. It takes about 10 mins to actually get her to brush her teeth.
Even this morning, we had a battle over her school socks!!! I asked her to roll them down a bit, as they were pulled fully up (ankle socks) and that was a battle royale. Simple requests are ALWAYS met with "I don't want to" or "no" and to be honest it's getting on my nerves. I am trying so hard not to lose my patience with her.
I have tried (since she was younger) naughty corner, naughty step, time out, reward charts, reward days out for good behaviour, pocket money on a Friday for doing well at school but all to no avail.
She now is able to go out with friends to the local park (with her mobile) and only gets out for an hour or so at a time (to give her some independence) and last night she was 25 mins late. I had already explained that the punishment for such things would be grounded the next night and seriously she has been on at me for the past 90 minutes crying and screaming and kicking up a fuss and throwing things. I have now resorted to ignoring her as there is nothing else I can do without losing my head!
At the end of all this I get the usual I hate you and its unfair and calls herself stupid and ugly.
she is unable to watch a full programme or film on TV and gets bored easy. She has no imagination with regard to keeping herself amused. She terrorises the cat. She breaks toys way too easily. she struggles to keep friends, as her attitude is her way or no way. She storms out of school every day with a face like thunder, cries at everything and anything, argues that black is white and does not EVER remember punishments that she has had in the past. it's like I'm teaching her values for nothing? Is this normal behaviour? I don't think so. My parents and sister are now finally seeing my daughters behaviour in a different light and now know that i'm not talking complete trash.
At school they operate a points system where each day they all get 5 points and have to keep them by the end of the school day. in primary 1 she started off well but its downhill all the way. she is now primary 3 (dont know the american equivalent) and each day gets only 1 or 2 points for continouously taking and disrputing in the classroom. the frustrating part is she is VERY VERY clever and academic. She is way ahead on spelling, reading, maths and they have given her extra work for her times tables all the way up to 7 times tables, which is more advanced than she should be.
I honestly dont know where to go with this one. My doctor wont listen and says its just a phase. I don't qualify for a local support group because I am NOT a single parent, and also I am a working parent (only part time) and also have a large extended family to help me. I thought support groups were supposed to be for one and all? Hence why I ended up here. I need advice. I seriously feel on the edge of depression and dont know where to turn to. I'm in UK by the way.
Sorry for it being long winded but once I started, I couldn't stop lol
Liz xxxxxx
I seriously believe my 7 year old daughter had ODD. I wouldnt class her as hyperactive and have therefore been looking for conditions similar to ADHD and ADD but when I come across ODD, I could tick every single box in the diagnosis section with ease. Some questions were saying if the child had shown signs of a particular item within the last 3 months, but my daughter is daily and it's getting worse.
Her behaviour has been somewhat "testing" since about 2-3 years old but I had put it down to her age. Then when she was 4-5 I put it down to her needing to start school, she was ready for it. But it has got worse. Much worse. Especially in the last 6 months or so.
Typical morning for us:
She gets up after a good sleep (which is one good thing I suppose, and I can't put her behaviour down to being tired). then we have to get ready for school. so we always have breakfast first. I allow her to pick her breakfast and then I get it ready for her. She will take on average about 25 mins to half hour to eat a bowl or cereal, this is normal for her and her pace. Can sometimes take her about an hour to eat her dinner! Then its time to have a wash, which she will point blank refuse to do. I have even just got her babywipes to make it much easier but even that is a hassle.
Then its teeth brushing. my goodness what a battle that is. It takes about 10 mins to actually get her to brush her teeth.
Even this morning, we had a battle over her school socks!!! I asked her to roll them down a bit, as they were pulled fully up (ankle socks) and that was a battle royale. Simple requests are ALWAYS met with "I don't want to" or "no" and to be honest it's getting on my nerves. I am trying so hard not to lose my patience with her.
I have tried (since she was younger) naughty corner, naughty step, time out, reward charts, reward days out for good behaviour, pocket money on a Friday for doing well at school but all to no avail.
She now is able to go out with friends to the local park (with her mobile) and only gets out for an hour or so at a time (to give her some independence) and last night she was 25 mins late. I had already explained that the punishment for such things would be grounded the next night and seriously she has been on at me for the past 90 minutes crying and screaming and kicking up a fuss and throwing things. I have now resorted to ignoring her as there is nothing else I can do without losing my head!
At the end of all this I get the usual I hate you and its unfair and calls herself stupid and ugly.
she is unable to watch a full programme or film on TV and gets bored easy. She has no imagination with regard to keeping herself amused. She terrorises the cat. She breaks toys way too easily. she struggles to keep friends, as her attitude is her way or no way. She storms out of school every day with a face like thunder, cries at everything and anything, argues that black is white and does not EVER remember punishments that she has had in the past. it's like I'm teaching her values for nothing? Is this normal behaviour? I don't think so. My parents and sister are now finally seeing my daughters behaviour in a different light and now know that i'm not talking complete trash.
At school they operate a points system where each day they all get 5 points and have to keep them by the end of the school day. in primary 1 she started off well but its downhill all the way. she is now primary 3 (dont know the american equivalent) and each day gets only 1 or 2 points for continouously taking and disrputing in the classroom. the frustrating part is she is VERY VERY clever and academic. She is way ahead on spelling, reading, maths and they have given her extra work for her times tables all the way up to 7 times tables, which is more advanced than she should be.
I honestly dont know where to go with this one. My doctor wont listen and says its just a phase. I don't qualify for a local support group because I am NOT a single parent, and also I am a working parent (only part time) and also have a large extended family to help me. I thought support groups were supposed to be for one and all? Hence why I ended up here. I need advice. I seriously feel on the edge of depression and dont know where to turn to. I'm in UK by the way.
Sorry for it being long winded but once I started, I couldn't stop lol
Liz xxxxxx