Post Surgery Updates


Roll With It
My dad ended up with not the triple bypass my mother expected, or the quadruple that he expected, but a quintuple bypass. It was really rough on my mother. It was esp hard when the surgeon said that the damage he saw was almost exclusively seen in untreated diabetics because it was so very bad. My dad has NEVER been diagnosis'd with diabetes, though apparently his doctor has said he had pre-diabetes, which to him meant no treatment needed.

Post heart surgery they treat you like you are diabetic, finger sticks and insulin and everything. Something about the healing process messes up your ability to make/use insulin and handle suger. My dad is a MAJOR sugar junkie and quite literally loathes vegetables. Many make him actually vomit, esp the smells. My mother wrote on the calendar that a week before the surgery he tasted a piece of broccoli and actually put it into his mouth. Even as a child his mother could not make that happen, and my mom still cannot cok it in the house as he literally gets sick to his stomach from the smell (autistic traits anyone? see where I get them!).

He is home and healing. It is 100 yards to walk around their entire home and he can do it four times in a day! This is HUGE. He has been rather grey looking for several years now and since the surgery he is actually looking healthy, you know, pink colored! I am excited for him. He is taking the diet very seriously and is driving my mother crazy with persnicketyness. We expected this, it is part of who he is. She went to our new apt with us today and had to do all sorts of things to get him ready to be home alone first, like turn the telephone over a certain way so he could see it easier. He is funny if you don't have to deal with him nonstop.

Bro has been there almost constantly. I have seen him at home twice now, though he came home five days after surgery. They told him it would be 7 days at first, then on day 4 they said it would be 7-9 days, then early the next am they said he was going home that day. TOTAL shock to all of us. I was almost out the door to go back to the hospital when my mom called and said to stay home. I really really REALLY wanted to be there more, but when my mom told me to go home, I did. I stayed with her in the hotel the night of the surgery, but gave her an hour or two of 'alone time' before I went to the hotel. She needs that time to decompress. I left the hospital when I realized that Dad would NOT rest while I was there. He fought to stay awake, talk, etc... if anyone was there when he really needed to sleep. Of course gfgbro insisted on staying in the room for hours at a time, even though it was incredibly clear that just being there meant Dad would not rest. Bro also growled at my mother during the surgery over things she said that didn't fit what HE thought she should be thinking about. He is an utter idiot.

Dad and Mom BOTH have actually thanked me for not 'being underfoot' since they got home. Seems bro has really not been willing to let them have more than maybe 24 hrs with-o his presence, plus of course he and his ex have to have someone to watch niece several times a week. Not like either of them just had their hearts stopped for a total plumbing redo, or anything, but they are 'busy' and cannot handle being single parents in charge of their child for 3 or 4 full days a week. I really expected better of bro, but whatever.

I did see him at the hospital, spent hours with him and my mom. Even hugged him and we supported each other and mom through this. Zero drama on a sibling level, which is what our parents needed. He tried to start things up at one point. I pretended I had no clue what he was doing and just acted as though he asked me what time it was. Even when mom was in with dad and we were alone together I just simply did not respond to the taunting and baiting. I am SO proud of myself for that!!!

It still does not mean that I want to do anything with him at any time. I didn't take my kids to the hospital to see my dad. Jess was not up to going because she got hit with a major migraine that lasted four days. thank you was busy with school and when he could go, my dad asked us not to take him. Dad also asked that niece not go, but she had to go and cook dinner for my mom at the hotel to show how she was the caring granddau. Only according to niece, niece didn't want to go. She went because her dad wanted to show how she loved her gma and gpa more than J and thank you did. He said that to his daughter, and she thought he was being an idiot. I know this, because NIECE told me this over at my parents! That girl has more common sense and logical thought than both her parents combined and cubed! I guess someone has to be the adult in that family group.

We have a new place to live. We have until May 15 to get moved in though much of the moving will happen in the next week. The new place is nice, has a pool, will be cheaper, and is just down the road from where we are now. My body is HATING the moving process and I have swelled up over forty pounds in under ten days. My body just does this under stress. All the doctors say is, 'that's weird, huh?" and they don't seem to know what to do about it. Yuck. One doctor thought I had just pigged out and eaten my weight up that much in ten days until I showed her the food diary the migraine doctor had me keep. Her comment was "yikes". Sigh.

I hope and pray that my dad will take this help and make the lifestyle changes he needs. Time will tell, but he can be pretty insistent on following rules if they are made very clear. His little brother is diabetic and has progressed to needing insulin BECAUSE of his eating choices. The man will eat a toddler size dinner portion of protein and veggies so that he can have a huge slice of pie or cake or other dessert. Then when his sugar goes too high he takes an insulin shot and says he is 'doing what the doctor said to do". If nothing else, my dad will stick to the rules because his little bro refuses to. They have an odd competition between them. I think my dad knows that if my uncle thinks my dad's diabetes is getting better without needing the advanced stages of treatment then my uncle will likely do all he can to follow the rules better than my dad does so that he can "one-up" my dad. Who knows, this might save not only my dad but his idiot brother too.

(I do have to laugh about something. Awhile back I made a comment about having an idiot brother. Dad looked at me and said, "I know your pain there." It made us both just crack up. Mom was int he other room and could NOT figure out why we were laughing. Come to think of it, we both have brothers who married lunatics also. Wow, go figure that one!

Thank you for the prayers and good thoughts through all of this. It has been very hard to see my dad hurting and to know that the best way to help was to NOT be right there at his side, but instead to stay in contact but let him have time to heal without having to entertain me. And in HIS mind, if we are there, he should be taking care of us,not the other way around. Right now what is in HIS mind and what HE needs are what I must take care of.

I may or may not have internet access all the time through the next couple of weeks, but I will be back.


Well-Known Member
So glad all went so well. Fingers crossed he does what he needs to do in order to be as healthy as he can!


Well-Known Member
I'm sorry, did you say that your brother expects your parents to babysit after bypass surgery? Are they doing it? If so, I'd like his phone number please. I have a piece of something I'd like to pass on to him. My mind...


Well-Known Member
LOL Witz...funny.

Susie, Im thrilled to hear that your dad is doing well. Hope he does manage to make all those lifestyle changes.


Im happy to hear everything went well and hoping to a fast and easy recovery!


Well-Known Member
This sounds like my own father who was pretty much on his death bed until the surgery gave him his old life back. It's been nothing short of a miracle for him and I hope the same will be for your dad. My dad had diabetes and then it went away once he had the surgery. He is his old self again, and I am sure your dad's heart is fixed up and he can live many more healthy years. My father had a quintuple bypass in 1997. He is fine, he even had another operation a year ago and they fixed that problem as well. I know it's scary, hugs.