ColleenB
Active Member
So our oldest son, who has been struggling with anxiety/depression and substance abuse, finally moved out.
He is working a labour job, not full time, but enough to eat. He says he is looking for full time... Not sure how hard, but that is not really my concern I guess.
Younger son found full time work and is saving to move out by end of summer and go back to school part time. I'm proud of how he has taken ownership of work and money... I'm thinking he will be ok.
Older son says he isn't using or selling. He still uses pot, doesn't see it as a drug .
But we don't think he is using harder drugs, or dealing. If he is... At least it isn't in my house anymore.
I'm still sad about how the last few years have gone... And have mourned the loss of my dreams for him.. College etc.... But I am slowly realizing it's his journey and not mine to make. Trying to be loving and supportive while still maintaining my own space away from drugs etc.... I love my son, but I have to admit I am ashamed of some of his choices and his lifestyle. None of our friends have dealt with this , all their kids are doing the traditional college etc... Route. Most have gotten scholarships and are very successful. I know it's pathetic to compare, but I can't help it. I do feel that somehow I failed as a parent... Having a drug user and dealer as a son is so shameful. I feel so sad about it... Still.
Anyway, just wanted to catch you all up. Over all it's good, we are moving forward.
He is working a labour job, not full time, but enough to eat. He says he is looking for full time... Not sure how hard, but that is not really my concern I guess.
Younger son found full time work and is saving to move out by end of summer and go back to school part time. I'm proud of how he has taken ownership of work and money... I'm thinking he will be ok.
Older son says he isn't using or selling. He still uses pot, doesn't see it as a drug .
But we don't think he is using harder drugs, or dealing. If he is... At least it isn't in my house anymore.
I'm still sad about how the last few years have gone... And have mourned the loss of my dreams for him.. College etc.... But I am slowly realizing it's his journey and not mine to make. Trying to be loving and supportive while still maintaining my own space away from drugs etc.... I love my son, but I have to admit I am ashamed of some of his choices and his lifestyle. None of our friends have dealt with this , all their kids are doing the traditional college etc... Route. Most have gotten scholarships and are very successful. I know it's pathetic to compare, but I can't help it. I do feel that somehow I failed as a parent... Having a drug user and dealer as a son is so shameful. I feel so sad about it... Still.
Anyway, just wanted to catch you all up. Over all it's good, we are moving forward.