mother in law's whimpy doctor told the sw that he wanted mother in law transfered to a nursing home. In no way shape or form does he want her living at home. SW called husband and I this morning and we met with her. I told her I'd been working on it.......and she knows we were trying last year too as she was "helping" (if you could call it that). But if she wasn't careful how she approached the idea and tried to bully mother in law, she wasn't going to cooperate. SW said didn't matter if mother in law cooperates or not, doctor planned to use the POA of husband's brother and force her into the nursing home. So, sw let husband and I approach mother in law first. Now, you all know that this actually means......ME......lol So I stressed that 12 hrs and had mother in law tell me all about it again. I wanted that memory fresh in her mind. Then I asked her if she'd been up and walking yet.... I knew full well she hadn't because doctor didn't want her out of bed. Little bit later in walks the sw (planned out beforehand) and starts talking about how they're concerned because it's too dangerous for her to go home. Of course mother in law is instantly defensive. Most especially when sw mentioned the nursing home. She turned to me and I reinforced the danger part, how she'd laid there for 12 hrs, how weak she is, that she's too weak and sore to be discharged home and yet hospital can only keep her for so many days. So we stressed "rehab" and a short stay to evaluate later how she is doing and if she will be able to manage at home. I got her to agree. Whew phew! She ought to be transferred tomorrow. Still under the impression she will be discharged to home from the nursing home. But we'll approach assisted living or continued nursing home stay once we have her placed and we see how she does. None of us expect her to return home again. Sneaky and underhanded, and I've done it hundreds of times with patients over the years, but never thought I'd have to use the same tactics on mother in law. But it worked and we won't have to use Power of Attorney against her. husband's brother and wife will arrive Sat and stay for several days. His wife is quite skilled about nursing homes and the like.......so I plan to pick her brain and get her to do some leg work for me. As for me.......spasms in the kidneys have subsided. But will be calling doctor as soon as mother in law is transferred. AND I'm dropping sociology and philosophy as both professors just piled on two huge papers ontop of normal homework and exams........and there is just no way in hades with this going on with mother in law that I'll have time to do that intense sort of work. My last Math class is Monday......so no problem there. Then I can focus on mother in law, getting my kidney issue settled, and maybe if I'm especially lucky...catch a little down time before next quarter begins.